Yea that’s right, its gym time baby. You know how I know its gym time? Cause I can feel the fucking pump! I can feel my veins expanding with every scoop of Nitro Shock Shotgun Blast. I can feel my body’s muscles infusing with all 3 lbs of raw meat I just pounded. I can feel my sheer man mass ripping my extra tight under armor duel vent warrior gear. I’ve got remixed Ramstein house music blasting on my midnight black ipod. I’ve ripped the bottom of my sweat pants off to let my diesel calves breathe. Yea I can feel the pump.


You wanna lift with me? Tough shit limp dick, you wouldn’t last a rep. I move more iron than a battleship. I grunt louder than a jet engine. My traps are larger than your mom’s fat ass. My biceps peak higher than Everest. I’ve memorized every single Arnold quote from Pumping Iron, which by the way is the second greatest movie next to Goodfellas. Hell, you know those 100lb plates they’ve got now? Yea they brought those in cause of me.

What’s that? Re-rack my weights? Fuck that they’ve got the gym bitches to do that peasant work. If I wanna empty the entire contents of the dumbbell rack you better damn well believe I will. It’s just an aftermath of my sheer dominance of this iron dungeon. Now get outta my way lard ass, as soon as my bro “Joey Pounds” blasts my ass with an Absolute Anabolic Anal Injection you better believe I’m gonna storm this gym like its Normandy.