My Predictable Ideas About Transportation and the Ante-Bellum Economy
I get 8 hours of sleep a night, and mommy and daddy pay for my education. Wagon trails were blah blah blah, canals boring drone drone drone drone drone, but railroads were better because professor McDoesn’t-Teach said so in lecture. I don’t have the balls to disagree with him, but I’m so dumb I don’t realize that kissing his ass won’t do much for my grade since Ed the Mega-TA is holding the red pen on this one. Sometimes I spell words phonetically. I also love splitting infinitives, and improperly formatting block quotes. Racial tensions were important because I watched the Ken Burns documentary about the Civil War and have no clue what the war was actually about. Jefferson and Hamilton are names I should mention if I want a B-, so here they are: Jefferson was a dude, Hamilton a guy, strong-state, weak-state, democracy, mercantilism.
I totally deserve a B-. Give me a B-. Look at my conclusion, it’s just the ideas you saw before. I sit next to the girl with the rack. I often ask questions that are redundant just to participate in class. It’s five o’ clock, so skim the rest of this paragraph so you can meet that cute Philosophy PHD student for happy hour. I did have something to say in this paper, but it’s not enough to impress anyone or seem like I give a crap, so I’m going to get a B-. Hamilton.