Situation #1: Someone asks for a lighter
1. Give that person a lighter.
1. Say, “Yeah, I’ve got one, but you can’t use it.”
2. Give coy look, wink (optional).
3. Say, “Haha here you go bro, I was just playin’.”
4. Reiterate the fact that you were just playin’ (this is important).
Situation #2: Someone asks you to put on a chill jam
1. Put on some Jack Johnson immediately.
1. Pick out a totally lame-o song (i.e. Spice Girls, Christina Aguilera (all hott btw)).
2. Attempt to sing along with the song, but not too well.
3. Laugh, give coy look, wink (optional).
4. Put on Jack Johnson
Situation #3: Someone tells you that you resemble a celebrity
1. Accept the compliment (note: this always is a compliment, no matter how attractive said celeb is. All celebs are better than non-celebs).
1. Think of an obscure movie/TV show that celebrity has been involved in.
2. Do an impression of said celeb in said movie/TV show.
3. If person doesn’t recognize what you’re referring to, insist that this movie/TV show is said celeb’s best work.
4. If person does recognizes what you’re referring to, say, “FINALLY! Someone who appreciates true comedy/drama/action/porno.”
5. Give coy look, wink (optional).
Situation #4: You’re waiting in line at a keg (awesome!).
1. Wait your turn and accept your beer.
1. When it is your turn, look towards the end of the line for fly hunnies.
2. Point to said fly hunny and say to server, “How could you possibly give me beer when this rare rose has been patiently waiting for some of this precious liquid.”
3. Let the babe cut in front of you and fill her cup.
4. Give coy look, wink (important).