Falling for a co-worker can be emotional torture, especially when they barely know you exist. When you're finally ready to express your affection for that special someone from the office, however, use this all-purpose love letter, which will win anyone over in any situation. I repeat, this note works for ANY situation.
Dear CO-WORKER'S NAME,
You don't know who I am, but we've been working at COMPANY together for the last NUMBER OF YEARS years. In that time, I've fallen deeply, madly in love with you. I first knew you were "the one" when I saw you wearing that COLOR OF CLOTHING ITEM OF CLOTHING. These feelings for you were only strengthened when you skillfully made NUMBER OF TOUCHDOWNS at our company's COMPANY ANNIVERSARY NUMBERth annual flag football tournament, despite nursing a sprained BODY PART INJURED from the previous week's fight with EMPLOYEE from DEPARTMENT.
I remember vividly seeing you at our fourth-quarter company "Hawaiian Luau" party last MONTH OF LUAU PARTY. You were wearing an antique blue velvet dress with COLOR trimming. In that light, you looked strikingly similar to CHARACTER from the Fox show 24 you know, the dark-haired actress from season SEASON NUMBER. It was then I realized, as the DJ spun Phil Collins's "PHIL COLLINS SONG," we were meant to be.
This isn't easy for me. Revealing my love for you may in fact be the most difficult thing I've done since smuggling ILLEGAL EXPORT out of South America to pay off my father's gambling debt. But I couldn't allow another moment to pass without letting you know how I feel. Tell me you share these emotions, and we can spend the rest of our days on my class-YACHT RANKING yacht, deep-sea fishing for DEEP-SEA FISH.