Jason Friedberg and Adam Seltzer, better known as the creative force behind parody films like "Date Movie," "Epic Movie" and "Meet the Spartans," meet with a high-powered studio executive to discuss their next project.
Jason Friedberg: Thanks for sitting down with us, sir. We've got a LOT of good ideas. We've been brainstorming all night.
Adam Seltzer: Brainstorming? More like GAYstorming, you homo. LOL. But seriously, we were having sex with each other.
Studio exec: Can we make this quick, guys? I'm really busy today, and also I hate you.
JF: Not after you hear what we've got cooked up now, right broseph?
AS: F*ckin'-A, dude. High five!
JF: High five!
SE: Jesus. (Looks at watch.) OK, let's hear it.
JF: Right, so we've covered romance, we've covered action-adventure and big-budget blockbusters
AS: but there's one genre we've left completely untouched. Until now.
SE: You mean you're going to make something funny. Actually funny.
AS: I told you he wouldn't understand.
JF: We're gonna make FUN of stuff that's funny.
SE: You want to parody comedies.
JF: Absolutely. Why should they get off so easy, right? Like you know that scene in "Superbad" where the fat kid draws a bunch of dicks? Well, in OUR version are you ready for this?
AS: I helped come up with this one.
JF: In OUR version, he draws a bunch of well, dicks. But they're dressed up like different celebrities, you know? Like Britney Spears, Donald Trump, Paris Hilton
AS: Paris Hilton!! Can you believe that!? That one was mine.
JF: And like, we'd incorporate the pregnancy plot from "Knocked Up," except this time when she gets to the hospital at the end
AS: she finds out that she really just had to take a big sh*t all along.
AS: The doctor who would be played by a Michael Jackson look-alike, by the way delivers it, and it's seriously, like, a piece of crap the size of a baby.
JF: and then it grabs a mic and performs a rap song. We haven't decided on which one yet.
AS: We're calling it "Funny Movie." Get it?
SE: Guys, I just don't know on this one. I'm starting to get death threats from movie critics for greenlighting these ideas
Assistant (busting in): Sir? We just got the weekend numbers in for "Spartans." Looks like we have another hit on our hands.
SE: Can you guys have a script to me by the end of the day?
JF: We already wrote most of it on this napkin.
SE: Perfect. Get Carmen Electra on the phone. I want this thing shooting by next week.