Get to know who your friends really are.



The only thing that feels better then a solid game of Mario Kart is crack. Or maybe playing Mario Kart on crack, that be sweet too. But next time you and your friends play watch carefully which characters your friends choose, becuase believe it or not which character each person chooses says a lot about their personality…



Personality Select



Mario – You're predictable and meek. You picked Mario because the game is called "Mario Kart" and the only reason you're playing it is so you can talk about how awesome it is to play it. And you're right it is awesome put it's called "playing for love of the game" not "playing so you can attempt to fit in". Shame on you for tinting Mario's good name, put the controller down and never touch it again.





Luigi
– You're a loyal friend that is often underappreciated by your peers. However you tend to attach your self to the most popular people and mimic them in every way. You'll go to a party with your "BOY!" and hover around him like a fuckin' herpes soar. You have no real self identity and you most likely cry when you masturbate, which you do a lot.



Donkey Kong- You're obnoxious and proud of it. You wax your chest on a regular basis and every time you poop you feel the urge to throw it at people. You wear your hat backwards and your sunglasses big.






Wario – You are clearly a homosexual. You're consistently cruel to people who you find threatening although you are the butt of everyone else's jokes but don't know it. You are overweight and have a poster of a classic hot rod on your wall. Quit being such a dick and acknowledge your sexuality.




Princess – You tend to get into trouble and rely on others to help you out of tough situations by using your looks to manipulate and control them. You preach about social issues you know nothing about to make people think you give a shit about anything other then partying. Your parents wish you were never born and deep down you know it.






Toad – You are the strong silent type, determined, and possibly retarded. You make others around you uncomfortable and don't even realize that you're just too random to be taken even remotely seriously. Success isn't easy for you; obstacles such as lack of size and being autistic stand in your way.






Yoshi – Your charisma and sensitivity make you a likable person. You constantly insist on giving people piggy back rides around campus and find your self on more then one occasion jerking off while watching "Jurassic Park".






Bowser – You are independent and constantly looking for a mate. You like to gel your hair, go to tanning salons, and wear tight shirts. You select the biggest, meanest, most manly character in the game because you think "He's just like me", but everyone knows why you really do it.