As Jon Stewart would say: "Here it is, your moment of zen." Except this time, the zen involves boobs, butts, and crazy people. Fun!

1. Kim Kardashian on vacation: now with 90% more skin than the regular version! [WWTDD]

2. This year American Idol has a stripper in its midst! And no, it's not Ryan Seacrest. Sorry grandmas! [IDLYITW]

3. Angelina looks hotter pregnant. Boobs do a body good. [WWTDD]

4. Paris Hilton staged some re-tar-tar publicity stunt, walking around with a guy dressed as a "guru." The result, no one cared. Watching her demise into irrelevancy is orgasmic! [WWTDD]

5. Kate Hudson is not pregnant, but she does have a thing for immature dudes. Isn't a guy who acts like a bay basically the same thing? [IDLYITW]

6. This is a picture of British model Jordan posing with a nuch of big girls in her pieces from her uncomfortable- looking underwear line. [Egotastic]

7. Here is the hottest actress you've never heard of. Because of her looks alone, I already hate her (though I hear from inside sources she's super cool. BOO!) [Egotastic]

8. Rehab did Eva Mendes good. She probably got facials in between group therapy. [HollywoodTuna]

9. Britney's dad is in charge of her for another four months. We can all say goodbye to the good old days of vag slips and meltdowns. [CelebSlam]

10. Roberty Downey Jr. is playing a black playing a white man (can you follow that?) in the new Ben Stiller movie Tropical Thunder. Say what? Apparently the billions of hilarious black actors in Hollywood weren't available. [DListed]

11. Nicole Richie hates her new, big boobs almost as much as we hated her skeletor look. Hopefully her baby daughter slaps – or bites – some sense into her. [DListed]

12. And finally, my main man Patrick Swayze confirmed that he has been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. I wish I could make a joke about this, but my mom actually passed away from this awful disease. If you're curious about it, you can learn more here. And pray for Patrick! Nobody puts Swayze in the corner! Not even cancer. [DListed]

- Kate