Adam Ruins Everything
Jake and Amir
Lies I Believed on the Fifth Grade Playground
March 19, 2008
Blue Balls will kill him.
Masturbating decreases the strength of your heart.
The average guy is 12 inches long.
If you're allergic to peanuts and the guy eats a lot of peanuts that day and you go down on him you could die.
You can get pregnant if his stuff touches your boobs.
If you get pregnant before you're married, the baby will come out retarded.
Masturbating makes you lose brain cells.
You shouldn't go to the dentist less than six months after you've given him oral because the dentist will be able to tell and he'll tell you parents.
Touching his balls too hard will kill him.
Masturbating gives you diabetes.
Only slutty girls shave their legs.
Fingering is supposed to be painful, it's just something the guy has to do get himself ready to have sex.
We like you. Do you like us too?
Don't ask me again.