What do you call the monogamous tyrant of Cuba?

Fidelity Castro

What do you call a Democrat who's been stabbed in the chest?

Bleeding Heart

What do you call two tickets to Les Misérables attached to a fishing line?

Queerbait

What did the French gangster call his artificial beach?

Faux Shore

Sorry, I usually last longer than that.  I swear, this has never happened to me before.  Do you…do you want to try again in a few hours?  I promise it will be better.