It's been an entire week since your last confession and there's been a lot of good, solid sinning going on across the country. Check out the top 5 and don't forget to submit your misdeeds to RoommateConfessions@GMail.com.
This is as noble of a prank as I can think of. There's a frat at our school (gotta leave the names and school out due to the lawsuit that I'll explain later) that is known for being the epitome of douche bags. My girlfriend and a girl friend of hers went to one of their parties (I warned her) and the friend ended up getting "forcefully taken advantage of" if you catch my drift. When initially reported, it was swept under the rug and the whole frat (and its loaded alums) all stepped up in defense. My gf's friend was bullied into dropping the charges in the beginning. Being the do-gooders that we are (and hating this rival house), me and my brosephs went to their house late one night and using one of our members knowlege of all things plumbing, disconnected the water source for the fire sprinkler system and ran a connection to the sewer force main by the lift station conveniently located a mere 50 from the sprinkler water connection on the side of the house. I then snuck into the house (approximately 5:30 am) and pulled the alarm, making sure to get the hell out before the shit began to rain. They got all their stuff and themselves coated in their own sh*t, and while it didn't fix what happened, my gf's friend smiled for one of the first times since the whole thing started.
Anonymous, School Not Given
I am not sure if this qualifies as a roommate misdeed, but I thought you might want to hear this anyway. Last year I ended up living with this stuck up cocky art student. Not that I hate art students or anything, but this guy (in his opinion) was smarter and more talented than anybody. Anyways we ended up clashing a couple times because he wouldn't clean up his sh*t and by the end of the year we never really talked to one another. When the lease ran out, we both moved out of the house. He had his mom come and move out all his stuff early and ended up leaving an entire truck load of stuff for me to take to the dump. That is not the worst part of this story though. I went back into his room and there, right were the end of his bed would have been, was a pile of 200 toe and finger nail clippings. I have never seen anything so gross. Who is so lazy or unsanitary that they believe the appropriate place to leave dirty clipped nails is just ground into the carpet at the end of a bed. What the f***. Anyways, I am willing to take all his crap to the dump but I am not willing to clean up an entire years worth of finger/toe nail clippings. So later that night his girlfriend came over the house to pick something up he forgot. I walked her in his room and said, "You can have his pillow back as soon as you get his nail clippings in the trash." So she cried while she picked up his nails. Although I got some satisfaction from his girlfriends tears, (is that sick?), I would have preferred him clean up himself. I haven't heard from artsy or his girlfriend since
good riddance. Justin
University of California, Santa Cruz
Sophomore year, my best friend and I were rooming in a triple with a random guy who was really annoying. He wrote a lot of papers, so one day while he was out, we went onto his computer and changed the AutoCorrect in Word so that every time he typed "the" or "and," it would auto-correct to "fag." I have no idea how long it took him to figure it out.
Anonymous, Wesleyan University
My sophomore year I was stuck living with 2 other guys who were both a pain in my ass, especially considering they had girlfriends who would constantly annoy the crap outta me by being around every minute of the day and trying to befriend me. It wouldn't have been a big deal, except for the fact that they were complete dogs. I was planning to move out right after the Christmas season so I decided to cut off all ties by devising a 'poop candle' and giving one to each of the girlfriends. I melted the wax of a large scented candle from Wal-Mart and poured it into a glass almost to the top. Then I placed a dried out log of poop and, with a wick wrapped around it, placed it in the middle of the wax, leaving the top exposed until the wax hardened. Once it set I gingerly poured some lighter fluid on the dry poop, letting it soak in before I topped off the candle with the rest of the wax, enclosing the turd. From what I heard one of 'em had the candle burn in her living room until the flame hit the poop, instantly causing the grossest smelling smoke bomb to be unleashed in the house. I don't know what happened to the other.
Dan, Flagler College