I Gave My Word to Stop at Third
Who are you, and why are you inside of me?

The Beets: Killer Tofu Tour '96
The shows they have for kids today are just pure crap. Remember Zoobilie Zoo? Remember Fraggle Rock? Remember Voltron? Remember Duck Tales? Remember…

Happy Festivus
Don't you dare try to call me between 6 and 7 PM on a weeknight.

Cougar Hunter
I will put this into anything. For Serious.

Speaker City
You're…you're crazy man. I like you, but you're crazy…I'm going to keep repeating this until somebody acknowledges that they know what I'm talking about!

Most Likely to Secede
Please, leave me alone. Can't you see I'm busy reading Lies My Teacher Told Me.

Carcetti for Mayor
Who is ready to talk about the greatest work of art the medium of television has ever produced? I know I am.

Gore in 2008
No, but seriously, we have a president that the people didn't even elect, man, and look what he's done since getting into office, just run the country into the ground…also, I'm racist

I don't care, I still have faith. Just go back and watch Exodus and you'll see how good that show can be.

Somebody, please bring up sports. I am ready to debate about anything. I will punch you in the face!

Attention Ladies: I Enjoyed The Notebook
I am a champion date rapist.

Wake and Bake

Pierce & Pierce Murders and Executions
I am by far the coolest person in this room.