Friend 1: Hey, did you guys hear about the liquor store on Main?
Friend 2: No, what happened?
GWRALSLN (a second after Friend 2): No, what happened?
Friend 3: Oh, I heard about that. Apparently some guy just ran in at like 10 last night in a ski mask and tried to hold them up.
Friend 2: Whoa, for real? I was there last night at like 9:45!
Friend 2: You must've been a really smooth criminal with those patented 5 blades!
Friend 3: Yeah, I bet after shaving you really cleaned up when you were "robbing the liquor store." Good one, man.
They exit. GWRALSLN sighs and wraps his razor in a hand-knitted bootie.