Carrie is sitting on the couch in an apartment chewing gum and reading Cosmopolitan.*The door opens and her boyfriend enters the roomCarrie: Well look what the cat drug in.Boyfriend: What the hell is wrong with you? Carrie: You got a lotta nerve walkin' in here with that attitude you cheatin' bastard.Boyfriend: I have a lot of nerve? My truck is completely destroyed and I know you did it! Carrie: Yeah I did do it! Maybe next time you'll think before you cheat.Boyfriend: Cheat? Are you completely nuts? I've been playing basketball at the "Y" all day. Carrie: I know you park your car there to cover up that your goin' over to Crocodile Jack's to shoot pool and sing karaoke with some bleach blonde hussy!Boyfriend: Please note my sweaty complexion, gym bag, and cut-off t-shirt. Plus its two o'clock in the afternoon! That bar is not even open until six!Carrie: I don't want to hear no more excuses! My momma was right about you…Boyfriend (sees a broken Louisville Slugger on the floor): What happened to the bat my dad gave me right before he died last year?!?!?Carrie: I smashed your lights out with it…Boyfriend: That bat was signed by Harmon Killebrew! Do you have any idea what it was worth?Carrie: You care about your truck and that damn bat more than you do me. Maybe now you'll learn your lesson.Boyfriend: Wow, you should really not be allowed to interact with society on a regular basis. Like, seriously, I think you need a serious psychological evaluation and maybe even a brief prison sentence.Carrie: Yeah there you go, talkin' bout some psycho babble bullshit…Boyfriend: No it's not "psycho babble" you are not a sane person. Remember what happened last winter?Carrie: What are you talkin' bout?Boyfriend: Remember, we were driving to visit your family in Cincinnati and it started snowing…Carrie: Oh that…Boyfriend: Yeah, you just freaked out, closed your eyes, raised your hands in the air, and screamed out "Jesus take the wheel!"Carrie: We lived didn't we?Boyfriend: Yeah, only because I grabbed the wheel about two seconds before we met an eighteen-wheeler going 70 miles an hour. Carrie: Yeah, well at least I don't cheat.Boyfriend: Well guess what, neither do I. And now you get to pay for all the damage you did to my car and I want you out of my apartment by tomorrow. I'm going to stay at my brother's house.Carrie: Come on don't do that. It's kind of funny if ya think about it… something we can tell our grandkids about. Hehe…Boyfriend: No we will not be having grandkids or any children for that matter. I would have to be clinically insane to even consider populating the Earth with your spawn. I was being serious earlier when I said you need needed some serious help. I'm done goodbye.Carrie: I don't need you! One day I'm gonna be famous and I'm gonna write a song about this and everyone will love me and think I'm beautiful.Boyfriend: Ok… best of luck you utterly amazing psycho.