Ethan: College football! (I'm too giddy to say anything coherent.)
Amir: Let's go straight into what matters: Best names you've heard hyped so far. I'll start: Knowshawn Moreno.
Ethan: I like any running back whose name sounds like a complete imperative sentence, so I'm going to agree with you. But really, any season in which there are also Heisman hopefuls named Beanie and Devine is going to be pretty good. Do you agree with Georgia in the top spot?
Ethan: Just because he's your Facebook friend doesn't mean you always have to side with Pete Carroll; he's never going to leave an awesome YouTube video on your Wall the way Mark Richt would.
Amir: I could do without the Superpokes, though.
Ethan: My favorite early-season storyline is that Notre Dame got votes in both polls. Were these voters just thawed out from a cryogenic freeze that began in the 50s? Or did they like the leadership they saw from Jimmy Claussen at the Beer Olympics?
Amir: Maybe its a Steve Spurrier Duke thing where he always gives them a vote as a sadistic practical joke or something I forget the story. Who do you think has the best chance of de-throning USC or Georgia to play the last game of the season?
Ethan: I think LSU could sneak in there if they can survive Appalachian State. If App. State's QB can pull off a name like Armanti, he can make upset magic two years in a row.
Amir: LSU's quarterback is a transfer from Harvard. That's not a good situation, unless you're writing a comedy.
Ethan: Who do you think can sneak into the top two?
Amir: You know how when you're playing basketball and you wait for all the big guys to go for a rebound hoping the ball gets deflected out to you? Then you start dribbling the other way and trip on your own feet? I can see a situation where all SEC teams beat eachother up and a West Virginia or Missouri sneaks in with an easier schedule, only to get trounced.
Ethan: Who do you think could really drop off this year?
Amir: Besides LSU, I think Kansas' miracle run in the top ten was a one season wonder. They won't finish in the top 25 this year.
Ethan: Crap, that was going to be my guess, too. Some of the other lesser-known teams in the top 25 seem like good shots to stick up there. South Florida is a legit program, and I'm thinking Wake Forest could maybe challenge Clemson for the ACC tittle. (Maybe I'm a Wake homer, but does anyone really feel good about Tommy Bowden?) Who's your Heisman sleeper?
Amir: Joe McKnight: Who you got in the Pacific Life Holiday bowl?!
Ethan: You are the worst USC homer ever, and it's particularly bad since you went to Cal. My sleeper's Michael Crabtree. He won't win the Heisman as a sophomore wideout, but he's incredibly good. He'll be a steal in your 2011 fantasy draft.
Amir: And a REAL steal in your 2010 draft.
Ethan: I actually took him in a draft this year. I like his chances to score NFL touchdowns better than anyone in the Ravens' receiving corps.
Amir: You leave Derrick Mason out of this.
Ethan: Speaking of NFL passing games, how bad must Matt Leinart be for Kurt Warner to pass him? One minute Leinart's hanging with Paris Hilton, the next day he's kicking it with JJ Arrington.
Amir: So you know I went to Cal, and like USC football, yet you ask me a question like that. How do you think that makes me feel?! But I'll answer it. How bad must Leinart be? 4 for 12 with three interceptions in a pre-season game bad.
Ethan: Do you think the Giants' D is done after losing their strongest player? (And yes, I want to see if you can spell his name.)
Amir: I can spell Michael Strahan. (Osi Diss!)
Ethan: Michael Strahan was their best player? (checks calendar.) Wow. It's 2004 again! Let's get excited for that John Kerry fella. Seems like everything's conspiring against the Giants to have a fat 7-9 season. Who else do you think might disappoint?
Amir: Here are my bold predictions, and remember, when it comes to NFL my bold predictions are NEVER WRONG: the Jets and the Browns will end the season under .500 and Jacksonville will win the AFC South.
Amir: Is it possible for no team to win a division? Like the NFC West?
Ethan: You know that commercial were Matt Hassebleck's offensive line is just a bunch of little nerds? Even if that came to pass, I'd still like the Seahawks to go 5-1 in their division games.
Amir: After injuries to Engram and Branch, and Hackett signing with Carolina that might actually happen. Got an interesting fact for us?
Ethan: That's your job.
Amir: Oh yeah. I have two: Notre Dame hasn't won a bowl game in fifteen years. And Osi Umenyiora (spelled correctly) is one of three players in the NFL born in England.
Ethan: I'm going to assume the other two were the Vick brothers.
Amir: Quite right!
Ethan: Until next week, get excited for fantasy drafts!
StraightCashHomey.net is a random jersey blog run by Ethan and Amir. Enjoy!