( Gustav waits anxiously as his younger brother, Ike ,walks through the door.)
Gustav: Oh hey Ike, way to be home on time. It's not like we had plans or anything.
Ike: Would you chill out? I was out getting some doughnuts ok
Gustav: Oh good. That's really just great. Keep filling up fatty, it's not like you took up 80 percent of the Gulf of Mexico or anything..
..You KNOW I have a thyroid problem!
Gustav: Oh is that it? See I thought only fatasses took 2 days to make landfall after hitting Cuba. Maybe it's just me I don't know.
Ike: Really Gustav? Gonna pull that card huh? At least I didn't buckle under the pressure and fall to a Category 2 at the last minute before landfall!
Gustav: My wind was ONE mile an hour under the cutoff! I was TOTALLY shorted on that!
Ike: Oh yeah? What about your storm surge Gustie? Huh?
Ike: What was that? I didn't hear you.
Gustav: 14 feet! I said 14 feet , there are you happy!
Ike: Thats right. 14 feet! AND WHAT DID I HAVE? Why don't you try 22 feet biatch! I rocked the Gulf coast like a what? A Hurricane , thats what! Feeling a little surge envy bro?
Gustav: Oh haha very funny! oOh great here comes grandpa
Great Hurricane of 1900: What are you boys doin? You should be out there chasin those Typhoon girlies out there! Get out of your tropical depressions and get out there!
Gustav: We were just talking about our landfall grandpa..
GHO1900: Landfall! I'll tell you a thing or two about landfall! Back in my day a storm knew how to be a storm, why I breezed over Galves-
Ike: We know ,you blew over Galveston Island and became the worst storm in U.S History
GHO1900: That's right! Why I can still remember making landfall that night, Just me and the ocean wreakin havoc on the coas-
Gustav: Oh my God, Grandpa's raining everywhere, Ike get him back to the Old Storm's Home before he goes Cat 1 on the carpet!
Ike: That's more than you'll do on your best day
Gustav: SCREW YOU!