Presidential Debates

Obama:  I'm for change.  I'll cut taxes for 95% of the population.

McCain:  He's black.

Obama:  I'm not Bush's puppet.

McCain:  Seriously.  That isn't a tan.

Obama:  I'll bring back our nation's credibility.

McCain:  I'm SO white!  Look, you can see right thourgh me.  My opponent, still black.

Obama:  I'll bring change to Washington.

McCain:  He won't change from being black.

VP Debates

Palin:  We're mavericks!

Biden:  She's a woman.

Palin:  We're not part of the good ole boy regime.

Biden:  Probably preggers right now.

Palin:  We're for smaller government.

Biden:  Shouldn't she be baking something?

Palin:  I'll help our special needs children.

Biden:  Women can't drive…how can they run a country? 

Palin:  We want less reform.

Biden takes off his pants and waves his penis at the crowd.