And thank God we'll never be as dumb as they are!
The Esteemed Founder of This Fine Column, Mr. Jeff Rubin
My dad carries around every cell phone he has ever owned because when he gets a new one it doesn't have his old numbers in its phonebook.
My mom is convinced I can pick up in my cell phone voice mail. every time she calls I get "Chris
are you there?
..Pick up if you're there
.ok, well, it's mom
..well I guess you're not there
.call me when you get this. It's mom. 555-1212."
When my mom changed her phone service provider the new plan she chose came with a free extra option. The choices included such essentials as caller ID or free conference calling. Unfortunately, to her, these options seemed like "scams to get you to buy more". The best most practical option for a technofile like herself? This was of course a separate fax line. My family does not own a fax machine. The result of this genius move? About 15 calls a day to the "fax line" from other fax machines. I came home for Christmas break and heard the phone ringing. I thought I'd be a normal human and answer the phone but when I went to pick it up I was met with my mother screaming, "DON'T ANSWER IT! DON'T ANSWER IT
ITS THE FAX MACHINES!!!"
Alice Newton, Nipissing University
I came home from work the other day and my mother complained that something was wrong with our phone line and she couldn't figure out what was wrong. I walked over to the cordless phone charger and sitting in the cradle was our digital cable remote. And sure enough when I turned the TV on all the settings were fucked up from her pressing buttons trying to call her sister in Montreal.
Rachel Burnham, York University
My dad keeps a single page he ripped out from his cell phone's user manual in his wallet, and has to refer to it every time he needs to add a new number to his contacts