Skip to the Part That Has to Do With You and Ignore the Rest
You're a time efficient genius. You can do ten tasks just as fast as a normal person can do one because you can look at any task and ignore all the parts that are clearly a waste of your time. We live in a world that is all about time management, and you have what it takes to rule this world.
Read the Title of the Article and Decide That it's Lame and Just Ignore it
You have flawless instincts. Just drop out of school and go straight to Las Vegas, because somehow you know exactly what's up. You can learn at a glance what it takes most people years to learn and most people are intimidated by your prowess.
You Don't Read the Article Because You're the One Who Wrote it
You're bored as hell and there's a very good chance you just had explosive diarrhea from the onion rings at Burger King.