Adam Ruins Everything
Jake and Amir
November 26, 2008
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I love Thanksgiving.
I love eating.
You're still down at the kids table, sweetheart.
I'll never respect you as an adult.
Ha! You kids just can't wait to finish your meals and get back to that Wii machine, can't you?
I can't believe I stormed Omaha Beach to make way for your generation.
Yeah, I'm actually on the Ultimate Frisbee team at school?
I'm smoking a lot of pot at school.
Son, why don't you drive home this year.
Son, I'm drunk.
So have you decided on a major yet?
You're an embarrassment to our family.
Let's go out and toss the old pig skin.
Let's not help with cleaning up.
I can't believe it's almost Christmas time!
I can't believe I have to see you people again in a month!
It's great to see the whole family together.
Could someone please pass the wine?
Can someone please pass the wine?
We like you. Do you like us too?
Don't ask me again.