Hitler called himself a misunderstood artist so he chose politics instead, rising quickly to the top and many years later, someone decided to make a movie about Tom Cruise trying to kill him. They blew the so-called Valkyrie conspiracy so far out of proportion that the facts have become all misconstrued. This is what really happened:

In 1907 and 1908, a young artist named Addie Hitler applied and got rejected twice from the Academy of Fine Arts Vienna. An angsty and misunderstood Addie trudged around his room for months each year hoping that maybe this would be the year he would get into art school. Both years young Addie was denied his anger grew a little more. His fists hurt from pounding on the bed in frustration. Every day at 4 PM, Claus von Stauffenberg, a nice, little Jewish boy who lived next door would come by to check on Addie and ask if he'd gotten into art school. After months of this, as you can imagine, Addie began to get a little tired of Claus dropping by.

Many moons had passed since Addie had received his second rejection letter from art school and he had not only started using his full name, Adolph, but he had also united the German state as one of the greatest and most powerful orators in history. Adolph had long forgotten the days of Claus von Stauffenberg but Claus hadn't forgotten young Addie.

As Adolph rose to power, Claus studied lock-picking, espionage and document forging. Locked away in dimly lit rooms, Claus became a master of these less than admirable crafts. On one fateful night in 1926, as Mein Kampf soared off of German bookshelves, Claus and his team stealthily broke into the Academy of Fine Arts Vienna. They knocked out the security guard and took his keys. Claus and crew went around the admissions building looking for the file labeled Hitler, A. Hours passed as Claus searched through decades of applications on file when finally he found the two rejected applications of young Addie.

With the files finally in hand, Claus forged a new application complete with a big red stamp stating that Addie Hitler was accepted to his long sought-after art school. He also typed a letter informing Addie that through years of mixups and misunderstandings with the failing German mail system, that his application of 1908 had been overturned and had in fact been accepted into Vienna. Unfortunately Hitler's address had changed many times and he was rather unavailable. As the 1920's turned into the 1940's, Hitler never received his letter. He never heard of his acceptance to the fine art school in Vienna. So he killed six million Jews and then himself, never knowing what life would be like as an artist.

And that, dear reader, is how the events depicted in the movie Valkyrie truly happened.