Happy 4/20 week, everyone!  I hope you all enjoyed your gateway drugs to their fullest potential.  If you're lucky, maybe one day you'll grow up to look just like Amy Winehouse! (DListed)

This week, everyone's favorite little person Hayden Panettiere was robbed of $15,000.  Panettiere fans say the robbery was committed by the same thief who decides the Best Actress Emmy Awards. (WWTDD)

Jai Ho-ly shit.  News broke this week that the father of 9-year-old Slumdog Millionaire actress Rubina Ali was attempting to sell her for $400,000.  For the fan who has everything! (IDLYITW)

Ridiculous picture of the week alert!  It's Virgin brand owner Sir Richard Branson kiteboarding with a naked supermodel clinging to his back like a howler monkey.  Oh.  So this is what rich people do for fun. (Egotastic)

Recent chubster Kevin Federline may be signing on as the new face of Nutrisystem, says the worst marketing team in history. (Celebslam)

Madonna was thrown off a horse this week, and immediately blamed paparazzi for the fall.  Only thing is, there were no paparazzi nearby.  What actually happened is that the horse felt Madonna's cold hands of death on its neck and took off for the hills.  Wouldn't you? (WWTDD)

After being linked to a plus-sized clothing line in US Weekly, Kim Kardashian went on her blog to rant and, most importantly, to let us all know she's a 'size 2.'  Which should work, since we're all blind idiots who don't know how numbers work. (IDLYITW)

The weather wasn't the only thing looking hot this week, and you'll never guess who's behind that incredible transition.  45-year-old Lisa Rinna's Playboy spread came out this week, and damn.  So that's why someone invented airbrushing. (IDLYITW)

Still frames from Jessica Biel's stripper flick Powder Blue hit the internet this week, and unlike the previous teasers, this one delivers.  I'm no expert, but I believe that is dried wax on her bare breasts?  There is no way this movie won't make a bazillion dollars. (Hollywood Tuna)

No idea who Abigail Clancy is, but she was the victim of an epic nip slip this week, and I feel it is my God-given duty to share these wardrobe malfunctions with you, regardless of the level of fame.  That is the CliffsNotes Creed.  I live and die by the Creed. (Egotastic)

Cleave of the week this week goes to the one and only Lindsay Lohan!  Wait, what?  Droopy sideboob against exposed ribcage doesn't count as cleave?  FINE.  Here's Kelly Brook's lame, normal cleavage.  You're no fun. (Hollywood Tuna)

Holy crap!  Dog the Bounty Hunter almost got shot this week on one of his bounty hunts.  And of course, the reality camera crew whose sole purpose is to follow Dog the Bounty Hunter around missed the entire thing.  Oh to be a fly on the wall at A&E that day. (DListed)

This week it was announced that Ellen Pompeo of Grey's Anatomy is pregnant!  Unfortunately, doctors are worried, as the fetus already weighs more than her. (DListed)

Whoa, did you know Matt Lauer was a total player!?  Apparently he's cheated on his wife so many times that she made a list of all the lucky ladies and threatened to release it if he cheated one more time.  Matthew McConaughey, are you listening?  I've got the premise of your next movie. (Celebslam)

And what week would be complete without reminding someone that they are gross?  This week's Still Got It was tough, with Tori Spelling's intensely disturbing boobs pitted against Mario Batali's can't-lose combo of fat with bad shoes.  But who can compete with the power couple of Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick, who stepped out this week looking like….well, like they Still Got It. (Celebslam, WWTDD)