Rated "R" for the hell of it.

Foley artists use everyday objects to create movie sound effects. For example, to replicate screaming, they use a saw and a leg.
I thought the movie Cliffhanger would have a more ambiguous ending.
-Adam Newman
Words To Live By
- Neighbor
- Street
- Cul-de-sac
- Other houses
-Rene B
My mom and dad are actually brother and sister. Not each other's, but still. Gross!
-Amir Blumenfeld
Sad: "I drank so much last night, I can't even remember what happened."
Sadder: "I ate so much last night, I can't even remember what happened."
-Dan Gurewitch
I use ice in the bedroom to get ladies excited about sleeping with me. Specifically ice surrounded by whiskey in a glass they then drink.
-Patrick Cassels
The Goodwill by my house burned down. There was over $15 worth of damage.
-Joel Bustamante
"Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds"
That's usually what I end up shouting at the end of Clue: The Beatles Edition.
-Brandon Pyle
Man, what if there was a gun club president who also had a huge dick? There'd be no stopping that guy.
-Owen Parsons
Pants are for people with somewhere to be.
-Andrew Brasuell
I dropped acid for the first time last week. It wouldn't have been so bad had it not been on my lab partner's foot, and had I not been so high on mushrooms.
-Rene B
Why do they call it Hit & Run?
It's usually hit, stop, look at the body, think about calling 911, forget about calling 911 and then run.
-Jekabs Elerts
"I was thinking about writing my Thesis on Kant." "Really? I was thinking of writing mine on won't. As in I won't be writing a thesis."
-H R