Adam Ruins Everything
Jake and Amir
Getting A Fergie Song Out Of Your Head
January 22, 2007
Though she is an atrocious songwriter and barely a woman, Fergie knows how to do one thing very, very well: get a song stuck in your head. From 'London Bridge' to 'Fergalious,' her trash beats and imbecile lyrics get caught in your brain and bounce around for days sometimes weeks without relenting. Thankfully, we've devised a clever way to get that Fergie song out of conscious mind and into the cold, dark place where you keep the memories of that scouting trip back in '94.
Put on your iPod and listen to a song even worse than one of Fergie's. The theory is that the combined terribleness of both steaming piles of awfulness will cancel each other out in your brain.
If step one does not work, procure a handgun of medium caliber (.38 is good) and end your life. Sadly, there are no other options.
Everyday Instruction Manual
We like you. Do you like us too?
Don't ask me again.