There is a new and beautiful phenomenon in the Internet community: Epic Amazon Review Threads (EARTs). These hidden gems, nestled in a facade of convenient consumerism, shed light on one of the world's oft forgotten facts; stuff is funny. Even more than that, people are funny. In the past, EARTs were the products of solitary figures of wit, but this need not be the case anymore. Let us join the lone warriors and together we can howl into the gleaming light of the Internet.
2. Once you've discovered your perfect item, there are two things that could happen: a. It has not already been reviewed. In which case it is your job, nay, your duty to write a review that will launch an Epic Amazon Review Thread. Or, b. Someone has already started an EART and you must continue it.
When starting an EART, you have a few stylistic options at your disposal:
Sometimes, though, someone else has already started the EART. You just need to keep it going. The first rule of maintaining an EART is not to talk about the EART. In fact, even mentioning the concept of Internet memes is too much.
There are certain times,however, when it seems as though a product is perfect for an EART, but, for some reason, the magic doesn't happen. How can that be the case? What does it mean for the state of the world if a gross, silly product can receive sincere reviews? It just means that we have to keep fighting. Good luck.
Fancy yourself an Internet Indiana Jones? Send your findings to InternetArchaeologist@gmail.com