Ah, September, it comes swiftly and kicks you in the ass. School is starting yet here you are, still in summer mode. Suck it up you pussy! It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia starts this month. And here is a drinking game to cushion the blow.
Don't go with shots on this one, remember Sport, it's a marathon.

-Drink everytime somebody uses the following phrases

—"throwing down life lessons"

—"what's up, bitches?"

—"pop that shirt off"

—"you want 'x' to pop" (ie "you want your muscles to pop," "this will make your eyes pop")

-Drink anytime the Gang mocks one another with a display of fake crying.

-Drink anytime someone in the Gang points something out as racist.

-Drink anytime someone is drinking on the show. 2x drink if it's a member of the gang.

-Drink anytime Dee is referred to as "Sweet Dee" by one of the Gang.

-Drink for any demeaning reference to Sweet Dee as old, ugly, untalented, or any combination thereof.

-Drinkfor any reference to Sweet Dee's backbrace.
—2x drink if they refer toher as a monster or "Aluminum Monster."
—3x drink if the back brace actually appears.

-Drinks for anytime Sweet Dee refers to the gang as "boners."

-Drink for any evidence of Charlie's illiteracy, or references to it by the Gang.

-Drinkanytime Frank brandishes a gun, or anyone brandishes a weapon.
—2xdrinks for characters other than Frank brandishing a gun.

-Drink anytime Frank wants "in on this action."

-Drinkanytime somebody is shown on drugs, or any reference to past drug use(including Charlie sniffing glue).
—2x drinks if they are shown taking the drugs or sniffing glue.

-Drink for any instance of a homoerotic massage.

-Drink anytime Charlie appears in long Johns.

-Drink for any appearance of the Waitress.
—2x drinks if the Gang actually calls her "waitress."

-drink for any appearance of the McPoyles or Rickety Cricket.

-Drink anytime someone in the Gang punctuates a point with "Boom!" or "Bam!"

-Drink anytime something is set on fire. 2x if it is a person or other living thing.

Following these guidelines, you should be fucked up or dead by the end of any episode.