Have you ever noticed that:

The only book people ever read anymore is facebook

In China sometimes you actually put a real dog in a doggy bag.

Most people who post on F My Life doesn't have a life to begin with?

Google images will give you a picture of a cat no matter what you search

Nobody really likes cats that much but they are all over the internet

The same ten or so people are the ones that post facebook statuses and they are usually the ones that you would rather not know about

A jockstrap should really just be called a cockstrap

Most of the people that you see crusading against abortion should have been aborted

If you're intelligent you're called a radical and if you're stupid you're called a patriot

If you add two random syllables together and put to on the end of it you have a drug name: "talotor," "daportor" "assholetor" "penistor"  Well maybe not the last two.

Most of the time a dog's real Doggy-style just involves humping a leg.

When you have a blot of acid you generally don't want to actually drop it. It usually costs a lot of money to be doing that.

A gay guy who really likes anal sex must be really confused when he thinks a guy is an asshole

People complain about the Partriot Act taking away their right to privacy, meanwhile they post everything about what happens to them on Twitter

PETA tends to act like a bunch of animals when they protest

People who are partially retarded (Americans) are actually worse to be around than people who are fully retarded

The plants grown on a funny farm would be really crazy

The only time that taking a break really sucks is when you are in a relationship

If Santa Claus and God were real they would probably have a huge rivalry going

That technically a bachelor's Best Woman is his soon-to-be-wife

The Boogie Man sounds like a guy that would be fun to dance with

That the cool people are usually hot. They are climatically confused.

Trojan condoms named themselves after the Trojan Horse, which involves an attack disguised as a gift, and generally it is only when you are pretending to wear a Trojan that it is really a Trojan Horse.

A guy can be both types of sexual parts: a dick and a pussy