Superman: So that about wraps it up for this week. Thank you everyone for coming to the meeting… Theres just one more subject that needs to be discussed, so Spidey and Batman can you just stay back for a minute. Everyone else can go.

Hulk: What about the rest of us? Why don't we need to hear what you have to say?

Superman: It just doesn't concern you…

Hulk: Oh c'mon, don't give me that. You're making me angry, and you won't…

The Flash: Shut the fuck up! Seriously Clark, what is it?

Its about merchandising.

Hulk: OK, so how does that not concern me? Did you not see my Hulk fists that made noises when you hit stuff?

Superman: Yeah i did, they were terrible.

C'mon man, the wholesale place where i buy my shirts just went bust, i could do without all this stress right now.

Superman: OK, so why don't you go and relax outside and we'll come out when were finished.

Hulk: Fine… I used to be a physicist you know.

Aquaman: I know for a fact this meeting doesn't concern me, no-one is going to make a film about me after Entourage took a steaming dump all over the concept of it… I'll see you guys later.

Robin: I'll be waiting in the car.

Superman: OK great, now we can get started. The 1st order of business today is belt-buckles, from what I've seen this only really applies to myself and Batman. So, the problem is that an ever increasing number of people are wearing belts with buckles that resemble our emblems…

Batman: I bet they don't have Batarangs built-in do they

Superman: Probably not.

Batman: Or a grappel gun…

Superman: No.

Batman: They probably don't even have a place to put your cash!

Superman: No, they are just ordinary belts, their main function is to hold up the wearers pants.



Yes, yes, we all love Lycra immensely, as I was saying, the problem is that we aren't seeing any of the money made from selling these. However, one of the guys from legal at the DP owes me one after I saved his wife from a runaway subway train. So he's promised to look into it for us…

Batman: Also… Capes for the win.

Spiderman: Capes are gay.

Batman: You're just jealous that you can't fly, and us cape wearers can!

Dude…you can't fly, you glide. Plus, I don't need to fly, I can websling just fine thank you.

Batman: Oh yeah? What happens when there are no skyscrapers around? I'd like to have seen you fight the Green Goblin in New Jersey!

Spiderman: Does New Jersey have lamp posts?

Batman: I'm guessing so.

Spiderman: Then I'd do my slingshot thing, HA.

superman: Seriously guys, now isn't the time. Now onto you Spidey, the other day i was at Lois' nephew's birthday party, and one of his presents was essentially a Spiderman branded silly string shooter…

Spiderman: Yeah that was my idea, awesome right?

Superman: Erm… you signed off on it?

Spiderman: Yeah, the deal was too good to refuse.

What did you get?

Spiderman: 5 cents from each one sold, and a shipping container of silly string.

Superman: What!? you know the MSRP on each one is $39.99. And why would you want a shipping container of silly string? You have an infinite amount of what is effectivley the ultimate silly string coming out of your wrists.

Spiderman: Its not the same…

Why not?

Because when i use my own stuff, i get labeled with bad nicknames…

Superman: Like what?

Spiderman: The friendly neighbourhood jizz slinger, and I'm on a register.

Batman: HA!