These are the 5 types of peole you will run into at an office meeting. They will make you laugh and they will make you want to cut their heads of with a chainsaw but one thing we can agree on is…they make meetings funner. If you just sit back and relax, observe, and pay attention you too will be able to write for hours about the idiots you work with.

1. The Sleeper

The sleeper is the guy who after about 5 minutes into the meeting starts bobbing his head, desperately trying to to stay away he just gives up. The Sleeper may sometimes snore, may occasionally hit his head on the table, or will fall off his chair. Usually the Sleeper is the person who cares enough to join the meeting but doesn't give a flying f*ck what the meeting is about. Chances are they go because they have been made to go. Best way to deal with this person is to let them sleep and mock them during the meeting while trying not to wake them up. Take a video to blackmail them at a later time.

2. The Blackberry Guy

The Blackberry Guy is the guy who is too important to care about the meeting. Always checking their blackberry constantly, its like the movie Speed, if they don't check their Blackberry at least 50 times, it will blow up. Then you have the younger Blackberry user, but they won't have a Blackberry, it will likely be an iPhone. They will be texting and playing games, oblivious to the fact that everyone notices they don't really give a sh*t. The first kind of blackberry user usually does his BB up high, so everyone can see that he is answering important emails. The later user will usually have it down below the table and they usually look like they are praying with their head bowed. Best way to deal with the BB Guy is to email them something like, "Hey f*cker, pay attention." They will likely check it, and stumble around and pretend they were never really on the BB.

3. The Repeater


The Repeater is the guy who doesn't really know whats going on, nor does he care, but wants to look like he cares. They will repeat everything everyone says. Sometimes loudly, sometimes they will just mumble it. For example, if someone say, "We need to create an analysis of our purchases," the Repeater will likely say something like, " Yes, we need to analyze purchases, " Or they may say mumble, "yes purchases." The best way to deal with the Repeater is to say as much stuff as you can as fast as you can and see if they can repeat it all.

4.The Questions Guy

These are some of the worst people to have in meetings. They will ask questions 'till your head explodes and will usually make the meeting run long. Usually the guy  is a complete retard and has a hard time understanding what everyone else seems to get. They will ask the same question over and over and over and usually in the same exact way. To deal with this type, just make them feel really stupid, tactfully draw attention to their stupidity and make everyone agree they are stupid. This person will usually shut up and continue to pester everyone after the meeting.

5. The Ass Kisser

This is the guy who never shows up to meetings when he should be there. But when an executive shows up, they are first ones there, usually trying to kiss as much ass as possible before the meeting starts. This person inhibits a bit of each guy mentioned up top. They ask a lot of questions because they like to make sure the executive notices them. They check their Blackberry constantly, after all, they want the executive to think they are busy and have lots of important business (even if they're just a low level employee which is usually the case), and this person will  ONLY repeat what the executive says and it will always be in agreement with what was said. To deal with this person, just kick their ass. They won't learn any other way, plus, it will feel good once you do.