Ever have a sh*tty job that you wanted to complain about in a weekly submission-based column named after Blink-182 lyrics? Send your submissions to worksuxiknow[at]gmail.com!
I work at a retail pharmacy and was given a list of people to call to ask if they wanted any prescriptions refilled. Halfway through the list, I dialed another number and asked for "John". His wife picked up and told me that "John" had died three weeks ago. I immediately apologized profusely. She then burst into tears and kept crying into the phone until I hung up on her.
So my first year of college I got a low paying job at the local ACE hardware. One day during the spring an elderly couple comes in and asks about a bug problem they have at there house. So I show them some products that would work. The main problem was that they didn't know what type of bugs they were, so their only reference that they had was showing the bite marks on the old mans leg. Needless to say the old women pulls up his short enough to see the marks and what looks like the lower half of his nut sack. These short weren't that far up . his nuts were that far down.
I worked as an EMT in a small Pennsylvania community and one day we get a call for a woman in labor we get there and as soon as we walked into the house you just knew between her and her husband they had about 4 braincells and they were fighting for space, but anyways we get her loaded into the back and it was my turn to drive so I got in the drivers seat and trying to be professional I asked the father if they knew whatthey were having and with the straightest face I have ever seen he looks right at me and says I don't know but we THINK it is going to be either a boy or girl. I about smashed the ambulance up when he said that.
I work at a supermarket here in the England. One shift when working on the tills, a huge jar of pickling vinegar came through. I thought it'd be really funny to make a quick joke, "That's huge, has someone lost a finger?" I got a pretty blank stare back.. it wasn't hilarious but some sort of facial expression would have been enough. When the guy handed over the money, I spotted just 2 fingers on his hand.
I used to work for Best buy geek squad. One day a lady came in because here computer was slow. I told her we could reinstall windows to fix the problem and even back up her old files. She agreed and I proceeded to back up her files, except when I plugged it in to the fancy machine it decided to spin out of control and start burning the hard drive. It was super awesome having to stand there and explain that to her on the phone and in the store while she was crying
I worked at a large movie theater chain when I was in highschool, as an usher. Taking tickets, and cleaning up theaters after people left were my responsibilities. One evening as I was on break, an irate man stormed out of the theater demanding I go in and tell a couple to stop having sex 2 rows behind him. So, naturally I went to see my friend the projectionist, and we proceeded to sit and watch, which happens alot more than you would think. After the couple, who were sitting at the TOP row, were finished, we opend the projection window and started applauding it was during the Rugrats movie. Bravo.
I used to work in a privately owned grocery store and had some interesting characters come in. One day while I was up front bagging for the checkers, an elderly woman had just purchased her groceries but as she started to walk out I noticed that she had left a bag. So semi-assertively I called to the woman and told her that she had forgotten a bag. As she turned to me she proceeded to poop one turd nugget that fell to the floor through her pants. When she went to turn she must have lost concentration on that fact she had to poop. I looked to the owner’s wife who was at the main office and I proceeded to leave and left the turd on the ground for her to clean up.