We all love to dream big. When you are in college the possiblitys are limitless. But very few of us can actually live the dream. For the rest of us, middle class doesn't look that bad. And for an unfortunate percentage of the population, the out look does not seem so bright. These are some possible outcomes for each degree of success by major.
The Dream: To be uncovering lost ruins in Rome, being interviewed by the History channel about the battle of Hamburger Hill, or writing a best selling book that reveals a secret affair of a founding father with their slave.
The Probable outcome: Trying to keep high school sophomores to pay attention in their fifth American History course.
Worst case scenario: Night manager of a local grocery store and married to an over bearing control freak who constantly reminds you that you should of gone into business.
The Dream: Solving complex algorithms that is used by Texas Insturments on their new T-1000 calculator. This results in you sitting on the beach counting your million and laughing at all the jocks that made fun of you in high school.
The Probable outcome: You end up becoming an certified accounant or actuary working a 9 to 5 desk job crunching numbers all day.
Worst case scenario: Your a janitor working at a college, where you are smarter then all the over privileged brats taking courses at your school. Your best friend is a Ben Aflect look alike and the two of you have Boston accents and hit on tall British girls.
The Dream: Performing at Carnegie hall or the House of Blues (depending on your style).
The Probable outcome: By day your a high school band director, but at night your a marginally successful local musician that plays at jazz bars.
Worst case scenario: You end up working at Guitar City and you're selling guiatars to spoiled emo kids.
The Dream: When people say fiction your name comes up along with King, Twain and Hemingway. Also your book is turned into a watered down box office success that sets you up for life.
The Probable outcome: An English teacher that is constantley trying to get their students to read novels instead of reading those damn spark notes.
The harsh reality: You get published, sell very few copies, start working for a small town newspaper, struggle with alcholiscm, and die suddenly. Following your death your book sales sky rocket through the roof and it is deemed an instant classic. What a tragedy? All that money and fame and no one to enjoy it but that illegitimate child you never knew about.
The Dream: Become a CEO of a company. Then make aggressive buisness deals that put you in charge of a conglomerate. Forge yourself into a titan of industry. Swim in your money just like Scrooge McDuck from Duck Tales.
The Probable outcome: Your a local Ford salesmen. That was recently promoted from the used car lot. Your moving on up in life. You'll be able to afford that 3 bed 2 bath town house in about two years.
Worst case scenario: Executive Salesman at the fourth largest branch of Electronic City in the tristate area. 35,000$ a year plus dental insurance. "ooo yeah"!
The Dream: Spend your entire career devolping a new theory that revolutionizes the world and leads to promising new horizons for the human race.
The Probable outcome: Eight more years spent in med school. 20 more years spent paying off your loans and 30 years enjoying the fruits of your labor. Can you say 'trophy wife'.
Worst case scenario: Working for a company named Futurex or Cemcore. Then watch as your work turns into huge profits for this corporation.
The Dream: Get drafted by the NFL. Go to the Pro Bowl, then the Hall of Fame. Move on from your professional sports career to become an espn analyst. In the mean time, you date a bunch of models.
The Probable outcome: Go back to your high school and become a football coach first and gym teacher second. Live your dreams through the kids you coach and blame all your problems on that cheap hit your rival pulled on you, to end your college career.
Worst case scenario: Deal steroids and HGH behind Super Fitness gym.
The Dream: see Physics.
The Probable outcome: You end up working for a drug company synthisizing new anti depresents and anphetamines to be sold to teenage boys.
Worst case scenario: You use your knoledge of mixing chemicals to cash in on the meth craze in the US. Next step then becomes either be killed in a drug war or taken to maximum security prison by the DEA, which you become cell mates with a very large man named Bubba.
The Dream: You become a lawyer, then a politician, and follow that up with creating and getting a bill for Universal Healthcare passed. With this to your credit you become President. Whats next?Fulfilling your childhood dream of ruling the world because no one would play with at recess.
The Probable outcome: Working for some Democrat's campaign or at some grass root political level.
Worst case scenario: Moving back in with Mom and Dad and work at Barnes & Noble during the day. Then at night your a liberal political blog super star that stands for the three As (Acid, Amnesty and Abortion).
So thats what you have to look forward to when you graduate. Maybe you shouldn't have gotten so many loans. Just remember if you end up in the worst case scenario category, money doesn't make people happy. I hope that makes you feel better about being a failure.