SARUMAN — Hello, hello, Sauron

You called, I can't hear a thing.

I have no service here

in Orthanc, you see, see

Wha-Wha-What did you see, huh?

You're breaking up on me

Sorry, I cannot hear you,

I'm kind of busy.

K-kind of busy

K-kind of busy

Sorry, I cannot hear you, I'm kind of busy.

 

Just a second,

It's my friend Gandalf they're gonna splay

And I cannot join you with

A staff in my hand, eh?

You should of made some plans with me,

You knew that I was free.

And now you won't stop bidding me;

I'm kind of busy.

 

Stop callin', stop callin',

Rohan is so ready to fall!

I left my head and my heart back in Mordor.

Stop callin', stop callin',

I am gonna send out my wargs!

I left my head and my heart back in Mordor.

 

Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh

Stop palantírin' me!

Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh

I'm busy!

Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh

Stop palantírin' me!

Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh

 

Can call all you want,

but ten thousand's home.

and you're not gonna reach my palantír!

Cuz I'm out in Fangorn,

and I'm splittin that shrub,

and you're not gonna reach my palantír!

 

Call when you want,

but there's no one home

and you're not gonna reach my palantír!

Out in the Wold,

and I'm staining that blood,

and you're not gonna reach my palantír!

 

SAURON — Boy, the way you blowin' up that wall

won't make them leave no faster.

Put my robe on faster,

leave my wraiths no faster.

I shoulda left my orcs at home,

cuz this is a disaster!

Wailin' like the Nazgul –

sorry, I cannot answer!

 

SARUMAN — Not that I don't like you,

I'm just in a quand'ry.

And I am sick and tired

of my place f-floodin.

Sometimes I feel like

I live in the Fens of Sirion. (A swamp)

Tonight I'm not takin calls cuz I'm

Overrun by trees.

 

Overrun by trees.

Overrun by trees.

Tonight I'm not takin calls cuz I'm overrun by trees .

 

Stop callin', stop callin',

Rohan is so ready to fall!

I left my head and my heart back in Mordor.

Stop callin', stop callin',

I am gonna send out my wargs!

I left my head and my heart back in Mordor.

 

Stop callin', stop callin',

Screw all of the gibbets and crows,

They'll ship my head and my heart back to Gondor.

Stop callin', stop callin',

I'm not gonna pay for the 'fold!

They'll ship my head and my heart back to Gondor.

 

Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh

Stop palantírin' me!

Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh

I'm fleein'!

Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh

Stop palantírin' me!

Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh

 

Can call all you want,

but I'm out with a nub,

and you're not gonna reach my palantír!

Cuz I'm out in the pub ,

with no paystub,

and you're not gonna reach my palantír!

 

Can call all you want,

but I'm out with a nub,

and you're not gonna reach my palantir!

Cuz I'm out in the pub ,

with no paystub,

and you're not gonna reach my palantir!

 

My palantír!

M-m-my palantír!

Cuz I'm out in the pub,

with no paystub,

and you're not gonna reach my palantír!

 

My palantír!

M-m-my palantír!

Cuz I just bed'ubed

Wormtongue's a nub

and you're not gonna reach my palantír!

 

We're sorry the Wizard you have reached is not in Middle-Earth at this time.

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