Throughout the various stages of your life you may have encountered the wonder that is texting. If you don’t know what texting is, please crawl out of your basement and become part of society. Texting allows two people who barely know each other (meet drunkenly last night at party) to communicate without actually speaking to each other. Though for all its wonders and glories texting poses some interesting problems and you have to know exactly what text messages really say, because often there is hidden meanings.


“Srry I couldn’t txt you yesterday, my phone died”

A completely reasonable excuse. Don’t worry she’s not ignoring you, you stud muffin! Her phone just died and she didn’t have her charger for some apparent reason. You should keep texting her everyday

“You should stop txting me you creep”

Classic case of playing hard to get. This is just her way of saying you should keep talking to me because I think you’re really attractive and fun to talk to. Also she probably wants to bang you

“yeah I don’t think I can hang out this weekend, I’m really busy”

No probs broski! She clearly loved your “ so like wanna chill or sumthing this weekend? Lol” text, shes just busy that’s all! Keep texting her every hour on the hour, and try again next weekend champ!

“I just wanna be friends, sorry”

This just means she loves you more than anything. You should reply as quickly as you can with a juicy text about your crazy feelings for her and how you couldn’t live without her. This is a sure fire way to get her to express what she really wants to say, and for her to bang you!

“                                         ”

No reply after two hours? No problem! She probably just didn’t get the text because of bad reception or something. Keep sending the same text over and over till she replies. Calling her over and over is also a valid option


No matter what the situation, texting is always a tricky and dangerous business. So keep your head up high and keep at it! Persistence is key. Don’t worry, she probably wants to bang you