Over the course of the year, I have been known in my fraternity to write and post new haikus about bro-life on my door in my fraternity house every day. Given, I'd like to think even though I'm in a fraternity, I'm not the pre-frayed-brim-visor-wearing, would-give-Jack-Johnson-a-bj stereotypical bro (although I have a soft spot for DMB), but if I AM in denial, at least self deprecation is still funny. Here are some of them…

First day of classes-
Check out that hot freshman girl!
Wait, that's your sister?

(These next two are meant to go together, wrote them while I was REAL hungover)

Dude, I love mornings…
Just drink shit tons of water
And you'll be ok!

But seriously,
Hangovers are sweet, broham.
Let's go watch SpongeBob

What happened last night?
I might have fucked that hot girl,
Or maybe her dog.

My brother is lost.
I feel like "The Hangover,"
But it's not funny.

Dude, being a bro
Isn't about getting grades;
It's about bitches.

Let's drink some natties!
And smoke some marijuana!
And snuggle later!

You were great last night!
Let's hook up again some time.
Wait, where's the condom?

I pop my collar.
I wear my plaid shorts to class. 
I might have herpes.

Let's vacation, bro!
I couldn't afford two beds…
I hope that's ok…

I'm gonna get laid.
Yo, here's my strategy:
Drink til she's pretty.

Yeah, I wax my chest.
It makes all the babes want me.
I wax my nuts, too. 

Wawa, I love you, 
Cuz when I get the munchies,
You are there for me.

Are you a chill bro?
Cuz I'm a pretty chill dude.
Let's chill together.

Vacations rule, bro!
Let's go home and get wasted!
But wait… my mom's here…

I am such a bro;
I love protein, beers, and girls.
That, and Coraline.

The weather's turned cold.
I can no longer wear birks
Or fuck on my porch.

Hooray for Greek Week!
Let's go be philanthropic,
and rage when we're done! 

Grinding up on girls,
Can't you see I rock parties?
Here's a roofie. Drink.

The girl I just fucked
Took my damn pajama pants.
WHAT THE FUCK?!? REALLY???

Look, I won't kiss you.
I mean, you just vomited…
… but maybe a beej…

What's with the fall, man?
All the girls wear too much clothes.
I'll just go beat off.

Welcome to our house!
Now slap the bag and chug wine!
Tour de Franzia!

The sweet hangover…
Walking to class in a daze…
Maybe I'm still drunk…

"I might have a beer…"
"Okay, I'll have a few more…"
And then I blacked out.

I said, "Let's have sex."
She said, "But I'm tired now,"
So I punched the bitch. 

That's all for now. I might post some more if this gets popular. Adios, kids.