Planning and Collegiate Reality

Plan: Study from 2-4 pm, before exam at 4:15.


2 pm- Sit down at laptop. Facebook stalk..see that ex is now in a relationship.

2:15 pm- Furiously text friends about it.

2:20 pm- Stalk new girlfriend’s Facebook

2:30 pm- Get up and eat something..

2:45 pm- Sit down at laptop. Start browsing CollegeHumor

2:50 pm- IM funny link to friend..swap more links.

3:00 pm- Head to the bathroom

3:05 pm- Stand in front of the mirror making funny faces..contemplate new hair, can’t afford it.

3:10 pm- Log back on Facebook. Read message from friend about your ex’s changed relationship status..discuss.

3:30 pm- Mom calls.

3:55 pm- Realize what time it is and start cursing. Still can’t get Mom off the phone, and get yelled at for cursing

4:15 pm- Make it to class just in time..with no studying.


Plan: Go to party, have a few drinks and a little fun


11 pm- Drunk.

11:15 pm- Start calling and texting various people

11:30 pm- Break the seal

11:45 pm- Get in drunken phone call/shouting match with ex

11:50 pm- Pee.

12:00 pm- Take another shot

12:10 pm- Pee. Start crying to other girls in the bathroom about your ex

12:20 pm- Pee.

12:30 pm- Call ex to apologize. New girlfriend picks up, and bigger fight ensues.

12:50 pm- Pee.

1:00 am- Take another shot

11:50 am- WTF!??!


Plan: Ration paycheck and save some.


12:00 am- Direct deposit

12:01 am- Grocery shopping of epic proportions..

10:00 am- Pay cell phone bill..wonder how you went over your minutes..oh, wait.

1:00 pm- Bookstore..ouch.

2:15 pm- Target

2:45 pm- Liquor store conveniently placed next to Target

3:20 pm- Broke again.


Plan: Graduate in four years, get good job

Reality: Barely make it in five years, plus a summer class for good measure. Work at Target..realize grad school may be your best bet and prepare to start  the process over again..