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A few months after me and my ex got together we were both really hard up for cash when I got offered a super sweet position in the Navy. Even if my gf didn't want to stay with me, I told her I understood but would still help put her through college and help her out all I could. Even still, she was pretty sad about it, and i ended up telling the Navy to shove off. 4 years later, while i am looking for grad schools she cheats on me with a fat guy from a tattoo shop. while all this is coming out she explains that the reason she'd been sad about the thought of me going to the navy was because that would mean that she wouldn't have had a car. Never too poor for gold diggers i guess.

-J

My girlfriend sent a text saying, "I love you!" so I replied back in text, "I love you too" she sends back "you sound mad"…how does someone sound mad in a TEXT!!!

-N

I dated this guy for a while and while I knew it wouldn't last past our freshman year, I figured what the heck and decided to give him my virginity. I wound up spending Thanksgiving with his family and roomed with his younger sister. I fell asleep that night and woke to him sneaking into the room. After making out for a while, we agreed (stupidly) to do it there. Now not only did it hurt since he was as inexperienced as I was, but we had sex in the his sisters room with her in it. And turns out later, she'd witnessed everything! I was mortified. Thank goodness I'll never see them again.

-Anonymous

My Jewish parents relentlessly opposed my two-year relationship with my gentile bf. They said an interfaith marriage would never last. Eventually the pressure broke us up. A year and half later, my parents get a divorce. He was the love of my life but now he's moved on.

-Bethany

My roommate and his girlfriend stumbled home from the movie theater last night, quite intoxicated. Once inside, they slammed open my bedroom door and shook me violently until I woke up. They demanded that I explain the movie Inception to them. After a five minute lecture on what I thought was the best movie of the year, all they did was stare at me. And then my roommate threw up on my feet.

-Greg S.

I met a girl at a bar one night, and ended up going home with her. I knew she had a 4-yr old daughter sleeping in the next room, but it wasnt a big deal. After the sitter went home, we moved to the bedroom and got things going. After a few minutes, I felt these eyes watching me, turned around, and her daughter was there watching, having wandered in from the other room. I pointed out her daughter and said she should be put back to bed. The girl I was with looked me dead in the eye and said, "Oh, its alright, she's seen this stuff lots of times." Game over.

-Anon

I got laid the other day because I got new glasses that make me look like Amir.

-Anonymous