· DO be up early, to get a good spot.
· DON’T stay up drinking the entire night before in order to be up early.
· DO make sure that all the grilled meat is thoroughly cooked.
· DON’T ask your friend's mom if she wants your meat.
· DO drink responsibly.
· DON’T call dibs on the keg.
· DO pick up all your trash when done tailgating.
· DON'T put all your trash in a pile and burn it before the game.
· DO sing the your school's fight song every time your team scores.
· DON'T headbutt random strangers after every first down.
· DO be respectful to the opposing team.
· DON'T continue to make sexual advances toward your friend’s mother.
· DO make sure to use the bathroom before halftime to avoid the rush.
· DON’T urinate on a fire hydrant and say you're doing your impression of a dog.
· DO have a good time with your friends.
· DON'T verbally berate your friends when they won’t let you stand on their shoulders to get a better view.
· DO rush the field if your team wins the game.
· DON'T streak the field with 30 seconds left.
· DO hang your head in shame if your team loses.
· DON'T follow up on all those overt attempts at nailing your friend’s mother if your team loses. Unless she’s really hot. In which case: DO. DO DO DO DO DO.
(I thought illustrations for each would be nice, but if it would be too difficult they're not necessary.)