1. To kill an insect: buck up men, if you're living co-ed you better get used to killing bugs. You wouldn't want to seem like a pussy for saying no, right?

 

2. She's locked out of her room: and she thinks you are just too cute, so she'll turn to you, using the dumb blond routine, even if her hair color is a more earth-tone, they all turn ditzy for men. So if you get a knock at one in the morning, spray some cologne and tell the skank to be quiet, you've got a damsel to save from distress.

 

3. Boredom: she and her crazy roommate are bored and looking to meet cute guys, or anyone for that matter, and if you are just lucky enough to be put in the "friend-zone" the first week, you better believe they'll be bugging you nonstop until they find a penis they are actually sexually attracted to.

 

4. She needs a utensil: sure, she can go to any of the girls' rooms in her hall and ask them for a plastic fork to consume the midnight ramen, but why would she? Hey, she's a sex hungry teenage freshmen girl, she'll take any reason to get a little closer to "brown chicken, brown cow" time.

 

5. Homework: you have both previously talked about having the same class and off-handed you mentioned that you should study together sometime, you better believe that when she comes over with those books, your door won't be the only thing being knocked that night.

 

6. She treats you like the RA (editors note, i have a totally sexy male RA): well, of course her RA lives on the floor and is very helpful, but why turn to him/her when she can ask you? Are you really complaining about her knocking on your door in her short bedtime shorts asking where she can get more garbage bags? Didn't think so.

 

7. She thinks you're cute: as obviously seen, majority of the reasons a girl is going to bug you, gentlemen, whilst you're enjoying your noon-time nap, studying, or chowing down are that she just wants a reason to talk to you. Hey, chances are she's an excited virginal present that you may just get the chance to unwrap.. But that starts by you enduring every little whim and giggle she throws at you.

 

Good luck boys ;)