Brain: Okay guys, let's just hang out, have a drink or two, and get back by midnight. We have a test in the morning. Good?

Legs: Got it.

Hips: I'm going to randomly move around weirdly to the music.

Eyes: Awkwardly scoping out girls here. Then when we make eye contact, turning away. Classic.

Hands: I'm just going to hold on to this cup of vodka. Maybe a gulp or two, to look natural. Or three. I'll, uh, just finish this cup.

(Alcohol enters)

Alcohol: Woo! What is up guys? Let's WRECK this party!

Brain: Wait, a second, I'm in charge here, and-

Alcohol: Not any more buddy. Eyes! Don't let the boobs out of your sight. Hips? Double-time! Okay no, not like that. Yikes…wow.

Brain: I'm not sure if-

Alcohol: Mouth? Pick up lines loud and often. Also, slurs.

Mouth: Sluring words or racial ones?

Alcohol: Both. And don't stop moving. We're talking loud, and we're making up name-drops.

Mouth: Like how I met Tony Hawk and he's now my best friend?

Alcohol: Sure, go with that. Also, you're rapping now. And where's-

Penis: YEAH! A GIRL!

Alcohol: There he is. Penis, you're in charge.

Eyes: Dude, she's like a four. Hundred pounds. She's like four hundred pounds dude. No.

Penis: WOO!

Alcohol: We don't care. We're pouncing. And by pouncing I mean stumbling towards. Let's do this!

Brain: You're going to regret this…

Penis: LET'S GO! YEAH!

Alcohol: I like your style, penis. I'm promoting you to 'brain'. Brain, you're, um, the legs now.

Brain: I quit. Good luck functioning without a brain, body.

Alcohol: Fine! You were cramping my style anyway. Plus, you're not going to want to remember this next part in the morning. Okay Penis, here we go!


Alcohol: Uh, Penis? Buddy?


Alcohol: Oh my god. No. No! Don't die on me, damn it!

Legs: You killed him!

Alcohol: Oh man, oh man…screw this, I'm out of here. Later nerds. And make sure to give the Brain a punch for me tomorrow morning.

Legs: Wait, you're stuck with us. How are you going to leave?

(Alcohol leaves)

Eyes: Gross.

Mouth: My bad.