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Last night I went out thinking I'd just have a few and this real cute girl ended up coming home with me. We went upstairs to my room and I told her to get comfy.  I went to the bathroom real quick. I heard a couple steps that sounded like her dipping out. After wondering and searching for like 30 minutes I came to the conclusion she had somehow left. It turns out she fell off the other side of the bed and ended up finding a pillow down there. I woke up to her standing up and scaring the crap out of me at 9am this morning.


My boyfriend wore girls’ jeans because they were, “more comfortable."


I woke up the next morning to the guy I had slept with farting on me in his sleep. When I accosted him for it, the first sleepy words out of his mouth were, "I thought you were my roommate sorry." Why'd he think I was his roommate?


My girlfriend said I have a really straight penis. How do I react to that?


My girlfriend and I broke up, but we got back together after I found out she bought me Yankee tickets as a surprise. We broke up for real after the game.


One night I had a small get together at my house with my girlfriend and some of our friends. It was during the week and i had work early in the morning so i decided to have a few shots of vodka and go to bed. My girlfriend came to bed later into the night. She was extremely wasted it was apparent after she woke me up to have sex. A little while into intercourse i felt a warm sensation around my pelvic region and finally discovered that she had pissed on me while having sex!


When i was in high school I lost my virginity to my first long term boyfriend. I didn't really know what was normal during sex and he did all kinds of weird shit that I've just recently found out is weird. One time while going down on me he blew into me. Consequently the next ten minutes of sex I couldn't stop queefing (GROSS). He then told me it was ok as if his weird technique had nothing to do with it… we broke up soon after.


My girlfriend saw a picture of Chewbacca and thought it was from Planet of the Apes. I thought that was bad enough, but then I showed her a picture of Biggie Smalls and she thought it was Kenan Thompson…