Local couple Ryan Dolham and Jessica Franklin recently realized that the only 45-plus consecutive minutes of music they can mutually tolerate is the new album by modern rock quartet Kings of Leon titled, Come Around Sundown. Even though neither one of them holds a special affinity for the album, it is one of the last musical options that can be played without ending in open, mutual animosity.
Reached for comment, Dolham said, "Well, it's definitely not what I'd listen to on my iPod, when I'm driving by myself, when I'm hanging out with my friends, or when I'm working out, but if I have to choose between this and that damn Taylor Swift mix CD she has or anything by Lady Gaga, I'm going to choose Come Around Sundown every time."
It appears that virtually all other options have been exhausted by the couple who, despite having polar opposite tastes in music, have "a pretty decent time together when they are drunk."
When the subject of music was approached, Franklin offered, "I really didn't like it the first time, but once Ryan told me it was by the 'Use Somebody-guys' I decided to give it a chance and now I can really tolerate it. I wouldn't say I'm into it or anything, though." She went on to say, "Anything is better than what he always listens to with his friends when they sit around and drink beer and whiskey and laugh about stuff that happened in high school. It sounds like the guy is just growling and it's all guitars and drums. I can't remember what it is." When asked to identify this group, Dolham exclaimed, "That's the [expletive deleted] Kings' first two albums! God, I hate her."
Due to the fact that currently their relationship is hanging by a thread with an unhealthy dependance on thirteen songs by four guys in their mid-20's from Tennessee, tensions are running high to branch out. This tension nearly came to a head Thursday night when an attempt to broaden the couple's musical options failed miserably. Franklin said she "was trying to do something nice, so I put a bunch of songs on a mix CD for us that I thought sounded like the album. Then when I played it, he skipped through all of the tracks and just went ballistic."
When asked to explain his actions, Dolham simply replied by listing off the bands on the compilation CD made by his current girlfriend, "Switchfoot, All-American Rejects, Goo Goo Dolls I mean, for God's sake, there was a damn Train song on that CD!"
Most recently, after a double date with a couple Jessica works with at a local retail clothing outlet the only thing that could cut the palpable tension during their ride home were the soaring guitars and sing-a-long arena rock choruses in Come Around Sundown. Trying to salvage what was left of their Saturday night, Jessica offered up this comment through a forced smile, "At least you never change it to the next track, right?"
Dolham smiled without showing his teeth, rolled down his window, and continued driving.
Later that night, after engaging in robotic-like, meaningless coitus, Franklin went into the bathroom to wash herself up and Dolham offered this insight, "I don't change the songs because they all sound pretty much the same."
Taking her place in the bed, Franklin placed her iPod in the alarm clock docking station next to her bed and, sensing the tension that comes from only being able to mutually tolerate, though not actually like one album, decided to play the only other song that both her and her boyfriend tolerated, though neither particularly liked. It was a parody song from Saturday Night Live featuring the lead singer of The Strokes, Julian Casablancas, titled "Boombox."