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A few years ago for Halloween, I made a Pyramid Head costume. It was three days of work. I thought it was awesome for a sophomore in high school. A lot of people thought it was pretty cool, too. But this one guy came up to me and told me that my whole costume was wrong, based off the movie. We had a 15 minute argument. I explained how Pyramid Head had an oblique quadrilateral pyramid in the game and how the sword grips is on the bottom next to the blade's edge. The thing that pissed me off the most was that he took away 15 minutes of trick or treating time.

Most people hide porn under their beds. I hide nine seasons of Dragonball Z.

I clip my Pokewalker to my bra under my shirt so I can level my Pokemon throughout the day without people knowing I'm a dork.

Last Halloween I dressed up as The Joker. It was a lot of fun, pulling pranks on my coworkers and having an excuse to flirt with girls dressed as Catwoman and Harley Quinn. I even made a point to pull harmless pranks on anyone dressed as Batman when I went out that night to clubs (whoopie cushions and the like). The trouble started when I went to get a drink and was met by a phenomenal looking woman dressed as The Little Mermaid. She looked me up and down and asked "why so serious?" with a come-hither look. Without thinking, I corrected her that I was The Joker from the comics, not the version Heath Ledger played in The Dark Knight. My buddy leaned in and whispered "and THAT is why you are going home alone tonight."

This year I was told that I could not bring my Xbox 360 to college because I was working full time and a full-time student. My parents said playing Xbox during vacation breaks when I came home would be my "dessert" for not failing college or losing my job. I was unsatisfied with that decision, so one Thursday I finished classes and drove three hours to my house when I thought they were out of town. To my surprise, they had come home early, so I pretended to surprise them. I claimed I missed them. Two hours later, I told them I had to go back to school and snuck the Xbox into the car. Six hours of driving never felt so satisfying.

I overclocked the processor and voided the warranty on my Droid so I could play Angry Birds with slightly less lag.

I just started work at the lead/zinc/copper mine here in town and have to wear a respirator all the time. During the night shift, it feels eerie with nobody around. To keep myself sane, I pretend there's been a nuclear meltdown and I've been sent in to search for survivors, and I can never remove my respirator, otherwise I will become an infected. Whenever I come across somebody I don't get along with, I pretend that they're infected and want to eat my brain. One night, I ran into one of them and they started talking about something really boring. I just started staring over the rail at the furnace pouring out molten lead. I was imagining that he tried to bite me and I threw him into it. He noticed I wasn't paying attention and that I was staring at the furnace and said "How much would it suck if someone were to fall in that, huh?" He had no idea I had just kicked his zombie ass and thrown him in.

Recently, my boyfriend started playing Ocarina of Time again. Every time I watch him play, I get really frustrated because he doesn't know where to look for hidden items and such. I've pretty much turned into his personal walkthrough. Last night, I got so annoyed that I took the controller away from him and started playing by myself. He looked super depressed.