#1 – “Little T Learns To Share" by Terrell Owens
Picture books are a great way for parents to instill strong moral values in their children. Or they could buy a book that relates a lesson about sharing from one of the most egoistical, narcissistic divas ever to play football!
Giving your children a book about sharing that's written by Terrell Owens makes roughly as much sense as shelling out $25 for a copy of “100 Tips For Great Sex" by Tim Tebow.
The book billed itself as “First in the T.O.'s Timeouts Series," but nearly four years later we're still waiting for the second installment. Possible titles: “Little T Learns to Insinuate His Former QB is Gay," “Little T Learns Which Sleeping Pills You Shouldn't Take Handfuls Of," and, of course, “Little T Learns That Burying Carson Palmer's Body Is a Lot More Work Than You'd Expect."
#2 – “Can You Take the Heat? The WWF Is Cooking!" by WWF Superstars
Yes, the WWE used to be the WWF, and someone in Vince McMahon's organization once thought that what wrestling fans really wanted was a cookbook by the promotion's superstars. Nevermind that the closest thing to a recipe most wrestling fans have seen is the reheating instructions on a Hot Pocket box; this was going to be a huge seller. Who better to take dietary advice from than a bunch of overweight guys with a marked tendency to die in their 40s?
Sadly, wrestling fans didn't flock to bookstores so they could get the recipe for Stone Cold's Texas Toast. Or Edge's Cocktail Party Meatballs. Or The Rock's Favorite Chocolate Chip Cookies.
On the plus side, every serving contained 4000% of your recommended daily allowance of human growth hormones.