It's been an entire week since your last confession and there's been a lot of good, solid sinning going on across the country. Check out the top 8 and don't forget to submit your misdeeds to our submission page!
Andrew S. from Skagit Valley College
My roommate keeps stealing my charcoal pencils (we're both art majors), so I cut tiny holes into all of her socks.
I suspected the b*tch I'm living with was using my stuff, but she assured me she couldn't possibly use my budget range of makeup and toiletries, as she only buys the best. After too many arguments I decided to test this theory by putting a full container of shaving gel in the shower, and not using it. Sure enough it was 100% empty in just a month. I have just finished emptying and refilling all her toiletries. Her conditioner is now Nair, her face lotion is hand soap, and I have oh so carefully replaced her hundreds of dollars worth of Mac makeup with non-branded, cheap as dirt, acne inducing store brand substitutes. I can't wait to see the results.
I had a best friend who was also a hardcore Christian. Well we were friends until my parents split up (you think she'd be more understanding as her Priest father left her mum for his secretary.) We were both in love with the same guy and when he chose her she actually kicked me out of the dorm we shared to sleep in the tiny spare room so she could share her room with him. Not that I was sad to miss out on their 'clean' canoodling! One day when she was out I was having a shower and feeling quite horny I used her large makeup brush to give myself a quite amazingly awesome moment! I heard her and him returning and as she was locked out I tried to rinse and return it and in my haste dropped it in the toilet! She still raves about how awesome that brush is
and so do I.
You know how you would let your phone alarm ring
and ring in the morning? And how you arranged the room so you got 70% of the floor space and the window (which served no purpose, because you always had the blinds closed)? Did you ever wonder why I didn't complain? Instead of walking down the hall to use the community bathroom, I peed in the sink. And then wiped my girly bits with your face towel. Every day for the entire semester. It wasn't minerals in the tapwater staining the sink that weird yellowish color.
One morning while getting ready for school I accidentally knocked your toothbrush into the toilet. I fished it out and set it back on the shelf, and I was going to tell you that night. but I forgot and when I remembered it was the next day and obviously then you would've been mad, so I never told you, and six months later you were still using that toothbrush. Don't worry though I had already flushed.
Just like every other freshman, I emailed my suitemate to introduce myself. 4 days later, I received a response-from her mom, saying that she was out of town with friends and she would email me back some other time. Okay, so that's odd. Fast forward a few weeks to move in day. My roommate and I waited until it got dark out for our suitemate to show up. She showed around dinner time, with 6 siblings to help her unpack. Since then, she has gone home every single weekend to be with her family, cleaned her room once (her dad came to vacuum, if that counts), left 3 bottles of ketchup open all winter break, makes popcorn everynight for dinner, only talks to us with her eyes closed, she'll fake yawn to avoid saying hi to us and never leaves her door open. My RA has never met her, and just last week someone asked if I really had a 3rd suitemate. Last weekend when she went home, I Febreezed the shit out of her room, for her own sake. Bad news: it still smells like dirt and popcorn.
Lauren G. from NYU
Not really a confession but there's these chicks who live below our apartment and they used to throw tampons and all sorts of shit at or in our windows, so I decided to get all my roommates to piss in a small bin (small trash can) and I got a wine bottle and threw it below towards their door (one of my roommate's windows is above there front door) so three of them came running to their door to see what happened they saw the bottle a few feet in front of them and one of them picked it up turned around and looked up at me, which made the other chicks step forward and look up so right then I poured the piss all over them. Don't mess with Irish lads.
Irish bull from Carlow.it