My left breast is a little bit bigger than my right. My boyfriend has named them and taken to referring to them as "lefty and the runt."
I got rejected by a woman the other night
She Google Earthed my address, saw that I lived in a crappy apartment, and called the date off.
While I was home for my once a month weekend visit, my girlfriend broke up with me via text message
she lives three houses down from mine.
My girlfriend doesn't like bacon. I like her a lot, but I don't know how much longer we're going to last
I was texting my gf while on the toilet, she asked what I was doing so I responded "I'm dropping a huge one, one for the ages!"
She replied "Yay, me too!". Its not as fun when she says it back.
My girlfriend and I were having sex, during which I was having trouble staying hard. You would think in this situation she would be going" its okay" or "dont worry about it!" but no, my girlfriend said, "STEP YA GAME UP! Marcus PSP." I stepped my game up.
I knew I was going to have sex with a girl for the first time, so I masturbated earlier in the day in order to last longer. When it actually went down, I couldn't finish. She got really upset and claimed I wasn't attracted to her.
I made the mistake of trying to get my ex into wow with me. All she ever did was bitch about it except for the lingo which she picked up fairly quickly. Soon after every single fight we had ended with her saying "Cool Story, Bro" and promptly hanging up on me.
My girlfriend seems to think it is fun to spoon and then pretend she is a guy by having my d**k between her legs.
Not only is my girlfriend better than me at Black Ops, but the other day when I was playing with her she proceeded to tell me to, "stop being a fucking camper!"
I like to drink bitch beer (Smirnoff, Mikes, etc..) and generally girlie drinks. I like regular beer too but it's not as refreshing to me. Whenever my fiance and I go to the store, I make her carry my drinks and I'll carry hers so that I look like a regular dude. She threatens to call me out just to make me nervous.