FILL-IN-THE-BLANK QUESTIONS1.) Dude, be careful hitting on that ——- girl Jessica, because I totally ——- her last semester.A. crazy . . got stalked byB. depressed . . used her low self-esteem to take advantage of C. underage . . legally adoptedD. pregnant . . put a baby in E. zombie . . killed

2.) You don't have to worry about ——- in your dorm room, as long as you ——- the RA.A. getting' freaky . . make a video of it forB. practicing Satanism . . sacrifice a virgin toC. distilling alcohol . . kidnap, and then disguise yourself asD. allowing illegal immigrants to run a sweat shop . . give free textiles toE. murder . . murder

3.) That professor is a real ——- and he totally ——- that midterm.A. downer . . was writing a suicide note duringB. hero . . deserves to be knighted forC. sex offender . . had sex with me on top ofD. big fan of child labor . . made Taiwanese six-year-olds gradeE. water buffalo . . blew my mind when he used his hoofs to distribute

TEXT-ANALYSIS QUESTIONSFrom: NATALIETo: JASONFun times this wknd! You were HILARIOUS. Cant w8 to C U soon!

4.) The word "HILARIOUS" most nearly means:A. SO DRUNKB. PLACED FIRMLY INTO MY FRIEND ZONEC. MISPRONOUNCING MY NAME THE WHOLE NIGHTD. NOT THE JASON I WAS THINKING OF WHEN I SAID I'D GO OUT WITH YOUE. QUESTIONED BY THE POLICE FOR LONGER THAN SEEMED NECESSARY

5.) The abbreviation "C U" most likely stands for:A. Cut U out of my lifeB. Create a Universe in which we never metC. Cruelly Un-friend you and totally tell everyone about itD. Call Uther dudesE. Clean out the map holder in my car where U vomited

6.) In context, the "Fun times" Natalie referred to were most probably:A. illegalB. unhealthyC. filled with regretD. tagged for your parent's friends to seeE. all of the above

ANALOGIES7.) MILLER LITE : TEQUILA :: A. A- : D+B. Burp : PukeC. Misdemeanor : FelonyD. 1st base : IntercourseE. Apologies : Child support

8.) CLASSMATE : ROOMMATE ::A. Awkward goodbyes : Awkward good morningsB. Hard to focus when they're passing notes in class : Hard to pee when they're passed out in the bathroomC. Terrible hand writing : Terrible guitar playing D. I copied your paper : I copied your identity E. "Can you loan me a pencil?" : "Can you stop masturbating long enough to loan me a pencil?"

9.) BEER BONG : BONG ::A. Running from the Cops : Watching CopsB. Frat : CommuneC. Natty Ice : Northern LightsD. Listening to Katy Perry : Listening to Katy Perry ironicallyE. What? : Huh?