For college students, winter break is without question primetime fertile ground for some good old fashioned rumor spreading. I mean, just look at the situation people from all parts of the country (your high school friends from other colleges) converging to the same place (your hometown) with nothing to talk about (face it, dude).
So, without further ado, I give you CollegeHumor's list of rumors to kick off the year 2K5. Of course we can't verify the authenticity of any of these. Spread "'em like butter, friends. Like metaphorical butter.
1. Desperate Housewives star Eva Longoria (best known as Gabrielle, the hot Hispanic woman who sleeps with her gardener) got her Hollywood start in" New Jersey. Longoria played a Bada Bing background stripper during the second season of The Sopranos. Copies of the second season DVD have become virtually unavailable at video rental stores.
2. After 15 consecutive years of putting out games, the John Madden video game franchise is taking a year off. There will be no Madden NFL 2006. With EA Sports acquiring the exclusive NFL game license (and in effect knocking out virtually any competition) it will take an extra year off for research and development and completely revamp the game for a big re-release for 2007.
3. Heartthrob rocker John Mayer refuses to take a paternity test for a woman in Austin, TX who claims to have slept with the singer during a Fall 2003 tour stop. The woman also claims to have received threatening calls from intoxicated members of Mayer's touring band.
4. No, it's not Buffalo wings or Chicken of the Sea: 98 Degrees singer and Newlyweds star Nick Lachey actually has a deadly allergy to peanuts. Lachey's tour riders and production contracts specify that no peanuts or peanut-based food may be present with a $5 million dollar violation penalty.
5. Despite his recent $50 million dollar Comedy Central contract, Dave Chapelle is still as thrifty as his days as an upcoming DC comic. On a recent trip to the Hard Rock Café in New York following a taping of a segment for his show, Dave picked up the $1600 tab for his cast mates, but left a paltry $100 tip.
6. At the end of the first 2005 fiscal quarter, AOLTimeWarner will no longer allow Instant Messenger profile changes for non-AOL paying subscribers. As of March 15th 2005, users of the free AIM service will be stuck with their current AIM profiles until getting a new screen name (which will contain the default "No Information Provided" message.)
7. Former news anchor and current first lady of California Maria Shriver is rumored to have a benign brain tumor. Calls to Governor Schwarzenegger's press secretary were returned with a statement that the illness is "not a tumor."
If you missed our last CH comedy night in LA, be sure to check out the one this Wednesday (9pm, Hollywood Improv). Tony Rock (Chris' brother) Harland Williams (Half Baked, Something About Mary), and Carlos Alazraqui (Lt. Garcia from Reno 911) will be performing. E-mail email@example.com here for free tickets. Now, hotlinks.
Quick thing! If you've ever shamed someone (or been shamed) and want to be in a Washington Post story, e-mail firstname.lastname@example.org. Word.