-I am a closet Stacey Orico fan. I'll admit it; I'm only kind of ashamed about it. I really enjoy her powerful voice and masterfully produced hit singles. However, I recently found out that she is Christian pop artist! Wait; let that settle in" a CHRISTIAN pop artist. If there is anything less cool than being dead, it's singing about Jesus. Not that Jesus isn't the man, just that he's not exactly the first thing you think of when you think about rock n' roll (can you see JC drinking a bottle of whiskey and lighting a groupie on fire? No? Me neither).

-So, when I hear young Stacey sing "There's got to be more to life than chasing that every temporary high," I am now forced to believe that the thing missing from her life is not my sexual pleasure, but the love Jesus! That's horrible. Way to ruin my fantasy Stacey. But hey, I've been with people that have had sex with me and invoked the name of Jesus at the same time. (Ex. Jesus! That hurts, don't do that anymore, you dick!)

-Now, this got me thinking. A lot of musicians could be doing just what Stacey is, pretending to sing about sex, drugs, and rock n' roll, while really singing about Jesus and God and all that stuff that people who pretend they are better than everyone like. For instance, when Maroon 5 sings "This love has taken its toll on me, she said goodbye too many times before," are they really singing about Mary Magdalene leaving Jesus at the foot of the cross? Or perhaps the issue of divorce within the Catholic Church?

-When that wholesomely annoying band, The Black Eyed Peas says, "Let's get retarded," do they really mean, "Let's get retarded" for the Lord and all His glory?" I would like to think that they are just singing about getting drunk, but there may be a deeper meaning.

-When Eamon sings "Fuck you, you ho. I don't want you back," is he recalling Jesus' refusal of the Devil's temptations in the desert? And who is this "Rocketman" Elton John was talking about? The only person I know that can fly is Jesus. "Stacey's Mom"" "Jesus' Mom"" Mary" sound familiar? "Sweet Child of Mine," is almost certainly about Mary's first words to the baby Jesus. Guns n' Roses were way into God, have you seen the "November Rain" video? They're in a church! Jay-Z may have "99 Problems" but the Lord is certainly not one of them.

-When The Who sing about a "teenage wasteland," they are really singing about how young people today have turned their back on the risen Christ. "Hey Jude" sounds uncannily like "Hey Judas"" think about it. Hey Weezer, you know who else looked like Buddy Holly if you cut his hair and gave him glasses" .Jesus! When Thin Lizzy sings about the boys being back in town, they obviously talking about Jesus and the 12 disciples coming gloriously into Jerusalem.

-But I think the most potent hidden Christina message in all of the popular songs of our time is in a Blink 182 song. They sing these potent lyrics; "He's a player, diarrhea giver," in Dysentery Gary. C'mon, everyone knows that those were Jesus' last words to Peter before he went to heaven. "Upon this rock, I will build my church…I am the one God, the holy light, and you will know my Father, he's a player, diarreah giver."

-I hope you have found this as disturbing as I have. I want to believe that these singers are just concerned with sex and partying" as I am. But now that I know they are all about God, I don't feel I can relate anymore. So Stacey, you may have turned to the Lord, but at least Creed still makes some solid rock n' roll with non-religious theme.