Glorious summer, how fair thee be
Underneath the hemlock tree.
The sun beats down its golden rays
And in the air, a silky haze.
But not for all is this time
Known as enchanted and divine.
No, some will dread its advancing gloom
As one of toil and of doom.
What people, you say, could be so dumb
To hate this season full of fun?
To this I say, be not alarmed
For it is the fat ones who are done great harm.
While summer may seem full of joy
For every little girl and boy
The fat kids do not share this vision
And entomb themselves in their basement prisons.
While you play along the waves and surf
There are others locked beneath the earth
Avoiding the beach and the waves
Playing video games to fill their days.
While the sun may make you tan and fit
The fat ones could not give a shit
For them that sun is an evil fire
Sent to make them profusely perspire.
While you frolic wearing close to nothing
The fat ones remain completely covered
For stricken are they if all should see
Their supple widths and their double Ds.
And as you recline in the hammock
You may not realize how lucky you have it
Because the fat ones are so big and round
They would bring that hammock straight to the ground.
And do not deny that you have hate
For their bellies so wide and great.
You freeze in terror when you hear them call
"I'm coming in" CANNONBALL!"
Open your hearts to these tortured souls
And let them have the last few dinner rolls
Take pity on their supple frame
For you may be like them one day.
And when that day dawns on you
Never forget what you must do.
Leave the beach, the pool, the park
And watch TV in the dark.
Dedicated to all my fellow fat people sweating out the best we can.