The Streety Awards IILadies and gentlemen, welcome to the voting for the second bi-monthly Streety Awards. The Streetys are decided by you, not some overpaid industry "expert" sitting around sipping mochas and lighting Cubans with his intern's hair. Also, the Streetys cover all manner of entertainment while ignoring such awards as "best digital sound editing" and "best use of duct tape on a soap opera set" so you get to the good stuff. Without further ado, here are your nominees for the second 2004 Streety Awards.Who farted?1. Oprah2. Keenan3. Cedric the Entertainer4. The DogFunniest Political News Program1. FOX News2. The Daily Show3. Hardball 4. CrossballsWorst Nickname1. Le Douche2. Skidmark3. Slutron 20004. HerpBest New Sports Trend1. Poker2. Dodgeball3. Volleyball4. Metered Decathlon (Romanian Version)Most Un-Funny Person Still Making Horrible Movies1. Adam Sandler2. Rob Schnieder3. Jim Carey4. Dana CarveyBets Formerly Funny TV Show That Has Overstayed Its Welcome1. That 70s Show2. The Simpsons3. The Newlyweds (debatable, might not have been funny in the first place)4. Saved By The Bell; The dead-end Career YearsBest Fake Breasts1. Lindsey Lohan2. Pamela Anderson3. Jenna Jameson4. Condoleezza RiceBest Line For Getting A Freshman Girl To Go Home With You1. "I live off campus."2. "All the girls in my class are fat."3. "I just got tested last week."4. "Hi."Best Chin1. Ashlee Simpson2. Jay Leno3. Superman (cartoon version)4. Michael Moore (has three)Male Celebrity I Would Most Like To Fight1. Ted Nudgent2. That nerdy guy from "Honey, I Shrunk the Kids"3. Fez From "That 70s Show."4. Frankie MunitzBest Celebrity Famous For No Reason1. Paris Hilton2. Nicky Hilton3. Ebeneezer Hilton III4. Wendell "'Chubs' HiltonFunniest Movie of the Summer1. "Napoleon Dynamite"2. "Without a Paddle"3. "Fahrenheit 9/11"4. "Streeter Walks Into Screen Door" (Home Movie)Best Way to Drink a Beer1. Shotgun2. Beerbong3. "CHUG, CHUG, CHUG!"4. Depressed, alone in your Mom's basement.Most Essential Item For Freshmen1. Condoms, Birth control pills2. George Foreman Grill3. School Hoodie4. Dad's credit cardPreferred Brand of Toe-less Shoe1. REEF2. Birkenstock3. TEVA4. K-Mart Red Light Special- Canvas Deck Flip Flop $3.99Best Snack Cracker1. Saltines2. Toastables3. Ritz4. Wheat ThinsWorst Excuse For Missing Class1. "I died"2. "There was a really good song on the radio"3. "I didn't buy the book."4. "My house got stolen."How Good at Football Were You in High School1. State Champs, dude, all four years.2. eh" I was more of a wrestler.3. More interested in the cheerleaders4. The bench has never been so warm.Funniest Movie When You Were 91. "Beetlejuice"2. "Home Alone 2; Lost in new York."3. "Ghostbusters"4. "Big"Best Place Celebrities Go To Die1. "The Surreal Life"2. "Hollywood Squares"3. "I Love The 80s/90s"4. ThailandThe New Black is" 1. Brown2. Pink3. Mauve4. your sister's boyfriend.Please email your votes to firstname.lastname@example.org. When all the votes are tallied, I'll announce the winners. Write-ins are welcome.