We all know summer is a great season. Patio weather, vacation time, BBQ, more BBQ. But sometimes, summer can kinda, sorta be a hot, sweaty drag. Luckily, many places have seasons that give us the ability to say so long to your balls sticking to your thighs, and hello hoodie weather. Here's some reasons you should be happy summer is almost over.
1. No more sweat in places you shouldn't be sweating
Let's face it. Actually, on second thought, let's not face it. Sweat is gross. Like, really gross. And should be limited to not your boobs or ball sack. There's nothing less refreshing than walking around with what feels like a water balloon burst in your underwear an hour ago but still hasn't completely dried.
2. No More Mosquitos
Good thing winter is nature's bug repellent. Because mosquitos are just terrible. They live because of our blood. What mooches. Tiny, itchy, blood-sucking vampire mooches. I don't even know why they exist.
3. You don't have to make excuses about why you can't go camping
Camping is outdoors torture. Hey, yeah, let's go sit outside where it's really, oppressively hot, sweat a lot and eat things from cans while we try not to get eaten by bears. But we WILL feed our flesh to bugs because we don't really have a choice. Yeah, sorry, guys, but I'm busy from now until mid-October.
4. No more stench of steaming, melting garbage
The sun is great for lots of things. Light. Keeping our planet alive. You know, sun stuff. It's also really good at taking something that already smells bad, and baking it until it smells like, well, hot trash (it's already a band name, sorry guys). But worse. Just, it's everywhere. Thanks for mostly everything, you giant burning star, except summer garbage.
5. Don't have to feel guilty about being on the internet
Listen, it's okay, we understand. The internet is way cooler than exercise, fresh air, and socializing. But, once winter comes around, it's hyber-netting time! It's cold and windy outside, time to sit by the fire and internet until next year.
6. Sayonara swimsuit anxiety
Didn't reach your ultimate beach body goal this summer? That's okay, because it'll be over soon and you don't have to worry about swimsuits and that little pooch of yours for a whole other year! In fact, you don't have to worry about bathing suits, overly crowded beaches OR that public pool that someone always manages to poop in.
7. No more menial summer job
Summer is great. Summer jobs, not so much. Say goodbye to retail, flippin' burgers, serving ice-cream to jerk kids or cleaning dog poop, whatever you crazy kids do these day for money. Back to the grind, homework, tests, wait, all of these things suck, too.
8. Halloween rules
Best. Holiday. Ever. Also October is the best and you know it. C'mon, all the beautiful changing leaves, the candied apples, and all the slutty costumes anyone could ever ask for.
9. Did I mention the oppressive heat?
It's hot. Seriously, it's way too hot. It's one thing to be kinda hot, but taking a dip in the ocean is refreshing, but when the sand at said ocean is burning "the apocalypse is now" into your skin like it's a demon out of The Exorcist, that's not okay. Heat, you're the worst.
10. Pretty much every T.V. show and sport is back on
SNL, Family Guy, Modern Family, whatever it is you watch, it's back on come fall. I mean, unless you're into True Blood. So grab your internet, camp out in front of the tv, and brace yourselves: winter is coming.